Dark is Here: Zandy James

Dark is Here







Zandy




Breathing... steady breathing... it’s all I hear. It’s my breathing…just steady… a little bit slow… I come out of my altered state of consciousness. My sleep. As I do, I keep my eyes closed. It’s my habit…. Now I can hear everything else. The closest sound is like an old ceiling fan spinning slowly just overhead. I can hear the familiar sound of a computer processor not far away. And…a very tiny high-pitched sound. Ok, so there’s a TV on in another room.…but…..the air……the air is……so…thick… and hot…there’s…water…dripping…slowly, into… a bucket or something somewhere near by……and…………..a sound…..…a sound like………like… small metal tools……on a tray……in a room… close by……………..


…Oh-no…



I squint but a bright light blinking overhead immediately blinds me. I try to open my eyes little by little so they can adjust to the light. What is my last memory? Where was I? I was……right; after Talisha’s pizza party…I wanted to go home and call Sophia…I was……walking home…then…the prick on my neck…I thought it was a bug bite…but then…my vision faded and……....…I never made it home…

Where am I now? I stay completely still. I’m careful not to try and move my arms and legs. I’m not ready to confirm that I don’t have that freedom anymore. I keep my focus on my environment, for now.
Above me is an old ceiling fan, spinning slowly. The light looks like it’s got a shortage. I lower my eyes very slowly. Two computers are sitting on a desk at the end of the room not far from me. On one screen I immediately recognize the Myspace.com homepage. The other screen looks like it’s logged onto some kind of chat room. A few feet away from the bed there’s a home video camera mounted on a tripod pointing right at me. Nothing else though. The rest of the room is empty, not even a window. Nothing but dusty wooden walls, and a smell like…
Ok, then I must be in a recently vacated building. Now for the hardest part. I wonder how I’m going to react to this. I’ll try to touch the tip of my nose with my finger. My arm trys to obey, but its new master is a thick yellow rope. There’s no slack, my arms and legs are stretched out as far as possible. My heart speeds way up. My body feels like its in a sudden panic, and now it’s like I’m awake for the first time again. Instead of trying to calm down, I struggle and pull against the ropes with all my body’s core strength. I strain and thrash until I feel the ropes dig into my wrists and ankles and start to burn. My body shoots adrenaline into my system and I test the ropes with even more strength. Nothing gives. I keep trying until I’m totally exhausted. Nothing has loosened, and my hands have started to turn purple. My eyes well up with tears and I yell out in defeat. I was right. I knew before I even opened my eyes… …So then…


…No…


How did this happen? I thought I was careful… What about Mom? I have tests tomorrow…I was supposed to be awarded my laptop by congress…but my IQ…I took it for granted? My stories…my poems…their still only in my head…all my ideas……so… that’s it? It’s over? One half of a score and two? Someone else will have to prove society wrong about us? This is fair? Mike…big brother…my hero…he
can’t…there’s no trace…no time…he’s………………he’s not coming………not this time…


“…No…no……NO!”

I decide to give it a second fight. I pull... I twist… I yank… I thrash.... I don’t stop, even though my wrists and ankles starting to bleed. I struggle hard until my whole body burns with exhaustion….

“Ahhhhhhhhh!” I yell out.


And now……..….I am defeated…………truly defeated… ….I’m in a place where my mind doesn’t matter……..all I have, is the body of an exhausted twelve-year-old girl…………………
this is…………it………..

I feel as if I should cry at least. But I’m…stunned. I’m in shock that this could ever happen to me. How did this happen? That prick I felt. What was it? There was no bug. Somebody shot me with something. Why? No reason. It might have been planned but it must have been a random selection. And I’m…
“No!” I whisper. “No! Not me!”

I notice that I suddenly have a visitor. I turn my head to look at the person standing next to me. Who is... is this? I blink my eyes really wide…. is it…him? In all his righteousness and majesty? Suddenly I just, understand. No, he isn’t here, but he did send one of his children. But I’m stunned all the same. My mouth quivers. Is he really here? I’m not close to crazy. Did he really come just to see me? But now, I’m reminded of my pitiful state and I can’t help but to cry. Because this… really is my… …

“I’m just a girl!” I cry. “…Just a girl named Zandy…”

God, this is really… but I want to… I dare not ask him why… I just can’t… even now; I just don’t have enough nerve. It just has to be this way… But, God I don’t want him to leave me. I…don’t want to go through this by myself. I want him to stay here with me…but I know…I know…oh God…God…
The angel holds my hand. It’s incredible.

“…Tell Jesus, I love him…” I whisper as best as I can.

The Angel leaves. I think his name is…Michael. And now my psychopath-abductor enters the room.

“Mom, I love you...” I cry.

He sits his tray of metal instruments down on the desk.

“Mike, I love you…” I cry again “…Sophie, I’m sorry…”

The man raises an eyebrow at me but then turns around and steps out of the room.

“Dad…wherever you are, I love you…” I cry once more.

The man comes back in and sits a large can in the corner. I thought I smelled gasoline. So I was right about that too. I’m not ever going to be found…He’s going to burn this whole building. He’s not going to leave anything behind. I already know what’s going to happen but I’m not worried about me anymore. I’m just worried about how my brother Mike is going to react. I hope this doesn’t cause him to hurt himself or anyone. God. And Sophie. Who’s going to be there for her?

“God please watch over them…”