I'm not a writer???

I am sitting here writing and I am naked and I love it. I am alone and I love that too. Sometimes I feel like I am unraveling somehow and don't care where from. I don't need to save the stitch and smooth it out. It's ok. I will learn from it all ......
So what is my story? I was wondering....what would it be like if I had to travel to Spain and France for writing assignments, as part of my work as an artist...a word artist..putting ideas and thoughts and beautiful pictures through words into the minds of anyone who would pick it up....how delicious!
I was wondering if I should tell the man I am pretend married to, that I will be moving alone with the kids. I know I would like to say that I really enjoy living with him but the truth is I don't anymore. I have seen the sickness and recognized it and I know I cannot live in it. We have one of those relationships that go around in circles....like the ferris wheel at the State Fair, when we are at the top, it's like there are no obstacles that can keep us from our happy life together. It all eventually comes to a screeching halt with some unintended mistake that I've made....not even knowing that it would bother him so much,and then I get bombarded with cruel remarks that cut my heart like razor claws he reaches into my chest with his words and kills me.
I love him.
He loves me.
He loves my family.
I have two children that live with me all the time. Their names are Solana who is six, and Elijah who is two. I also have two children that live with their father, my ex husband. Their names are Hannah who is almost fifteen, and Jacob, who is thirteen......To Be Continued next week