I could really see this with an acoustic guitar, a violin, perhaps an ocarina. The flow was superb, the message clear, and it is definitely thought-provoking. I find myself pondering about the shadowed paradox implied by taking pills that suppress one’s personality and then expressing it through a form of art. It brings up the broader aspect of dependence on harmful things and our many forms of glorifying our personal vandalism. (Either directly or indirectly by means of displacement) It also brought me to consider our mercantile society and how that’s also an abusive medium that’s glorified.
Needless to say, it had a message and provoked a response. Five stars, in my opinion.
There are a few editing things with flow – almost like a rhyme. Sometimes it’s there and sometimes it isn’t. When it’s not it sort of tripped me up, but otherwise GREAT imagery! I was seeing myself dip my feet in a glen and sitting in a police station. You lead up to it well – I was suspicious, then the last paragraph goes BAM! So you planted the seed, you culminated its growth, and then you show that the plant wasn’t what we thought. Indeed, I liked it.
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