\"Writing.Com
*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/timmartin
Review Requests: OFF
12 Public Reviews Given
12 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
1
1
Review of Intent  Open in new Window.
Review by Tim Martin Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
An interesting start, I see that you are experimenting in flash fiction and I would encourage you to keep experimenting as who knows what you may find, and It would be nice to see an expansion on this, or even a poem. Some of the imagery was very moving towards the end and the sudden stop is effective. Keep experimenting!
2
2
Review by Tim Martin Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 18+ | (3.5)
The premise is interesting, and has a good tone throughout almost dissecting what makes us who we are, through base instincts to psychological growth as a child, however I feel a little disconnected with it as it needs a little work to make it really engaging. I think due to its intense psychological and philosophical nature, reminding me of my A-level days, it could be a very interesting premise for a work of fiction, or if that's not your thing then perhaps an essay. However one thing I find it lacking would be other theories that coincide or conflict. I can tell that there is a Richard Dawkins' style view point through parts, so I would recommend looking through his works or some quotes if you haven't already. As this is a perspective piece, I understand why it would be difficult to present more than one side, perhaps as an essay or fiction you could expand the concept and be able to present a whole argument to this way of thinking allowing countering points from other philosophers such as Emmanuel Kant, John Stuart Mill and others in order to explore almost entirely the concepts that you present and enrich the work that you have done already. This is just a suggestion so be free to regard or disregard it at your will. The spelling and grammar is another issue, there are a few points that may need tiny alterations, through punctuation or changing a word around but nothing too severe.

A good start!
3
3
Review by Tim Martin Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
Unusual, in a good way. it has merits, humor and I can guess you received inspiration from the film Joe's apartment. If not this has similar concept, where there are talking cockroaches who get up to mischief. It has attention grabbing sentences and good descriptions with the low word limit.

There is not much that needs improvements, but if you want to expand on this story I would recommend a little more description and perhaps more of what life is like for both, to compare how similar/ different they are...

Keep writing!
4
4
Review by Tim Martin Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
Ok... some good things. You have obviously looked into the book, plot and structure on a good level and have explained carefully your arguments and given evidence to support that and then explained it clearly. You also brought in an opinion to the report as well as explained why. Your argument is concise, balanced and structured.

Some improvements: Maybe some extra detail and looking into the books themes as well as what you think the book is trying to tell us for example the Zombies may be a metaphor or perhaps only one country expecting this is showing how the governments view the importance of the populace etc. There may be more in the book than what you see. This may be a good start for expanding on the depth of the review, include quotes and expand your analysis. the first section is also important as it outlines what the book is trying to do so you can also measure how well it has done what it has set out to do.

You have made a good start to it though and really from there you can go deeper to get into the novel and you will be able to measure how well the novel not only entertains and thrills but also how well its underlying points are explained.
5
5
Review by Tim Martin Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
A good chapter with an interesting premise, you blend humor, with your dialogue which is always good to see in a story with some real tense emotions between characters with a history.

There is always room for improvement, such as finding other words for things and mixing it up a little when it comes to descriptions (you used cold twice very close together almost less than two lines apart.... perhaps cool, ice like, even if its an adjective before hand may give some descriptions a little more variety.
6
6
Review by Tim Martin Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
I like the oppressive hopelessness of this poem, and the apocalyptic feel to it. I find that the promise of hope that is soon diminished is a good place to start for true dark fiction and poems. Good job. Just wondering though is destruction the physical manifestation of the force of death and destruction or is it a human who is so blood thirsty that they simply kill everything? Keep going at it!
7
7
Review of Hell Hath No Fury  Open in new Window.
Review by Tim Martin Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
interesting if a little disjointed, but good.
7 Reviews · *Magnify*
Page of 1 · 25 per page   < >
Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/timmartin