Absolutely terrifying, in a really good way! The opening lines had me immediately hooked.
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Looks good!
Suggestions/comments:
The last line seems like there’s room for more description of this character’s actions, which would be necessary to a lengthier piece about him. What kind of maniacal thoughts, actions, and expressions does he make? How does he show that inflicting pain brings him pleasure?
I’m also terribly curious about how a 9-year-old managers to inflict that kind of pain on a poor chihuahua, not emotionally because he is obviously a very deranged character, but physically…what does he use to flay the flesh? Where did the toothpicks come from? Jaw muscles are very strong, so how did he manage to rip that off and how did he prevent the dog from bleeding to death? (In a small dog, I imagine the jaw would be very close to some major arteries in the neck.) These are some things to consider and details I’d love to see in a longer scene about this character.
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