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Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/pstafford93
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Review by Peter Stafford Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
I am delighted to have seen your name in the list after you left me a kind review on my own work, I can repay the favour!

From a macro point of view I really like the message of this poem; that your personal worth is not just valued on self-reflection but on the benefit you provide to the community around you. I especially like the fact that the poem takes the perspective of both sides (Stone/Dove) as it creates the comparison between the two opinions and helps highlight the limitations of the Stone's perspective.

On a technical level, the poem is relatively simple: six line stanza's throughout with alternate end rhyme and non-rhyming lines. Most lines are of seven syllables but the breaks with this form lead me to think that you have concentrated on how the poem reads/sounds more than a distinct metre. This is similar to a style I used to use a lot and I feel that it has a great effect of providing a good cavas to write upon that lets the message of the poem speak for itself.

I don't know if you already do this, but I would recommend reading your poems aloud and see if they flow as you want them to when read out. This may help with the few points were I feel the wording used is a little clunky. For example I feel like the last two lines lose the flow of the previous stanza's, but kudos if that was done for effect.

A good poem with a great message.

pgstafford
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