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Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/kaptainkq
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22 Public Reviews Given
22 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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Review of Fun With Felines  Open in new Window.
Review by KaptainKq Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
A fairly charming read. Very easy to relate to. The pacing was alright; not too slow, not too fast. The writing wasn't too flowery, and the word choice was good.

That seems like a lot of cats, though. Certainly not as many cats as other people can have, but still.
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Review of Obsolete  Open in new Window.
Review by KaptainKq Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
That was a neat little story. Pretty fun to read, even if I saw the ending coming a mile away.

The banter between Mike and Roy was entertaining. The repetition of the word "obsolete" was effective.

And, in my own opinion, I liked how you only gave the DTH-6 a minimal amount of personification, despite being fairly humanoid. Believe me, that's not a back-handed compliment: I genuinely appreciate that you side-stepped a brooding exploration of what makes an advanced AI different from a human mind and "Isn't it wrong to destroy something that has human thought and emotion?" That kept the story relatively light-hearted and easy to read through.
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Review by KaptainKq Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (3.5)
You set up the scene fairly well. The hunting lodge sounds like a nice place. I'll be honest, though: You seem to use "self-pronouns" (I, my, me) a lot. These are unavoidable in a first-person narrative, of course, but I think the story would be better served with some more description between each instance that you re-situate the character in your story.
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Review by KaptainKq Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 18+ | (3.5)
It's a sweet story. I'm a little curious as to how old the characters are when they originally began speaking, though. Ru, seeming to have an office job, can't be younger than twenty-one. Myra, though, is a bit of a mystery, though; it appears she's beholden to her parent's whims.

It's understandable that you'd withhold their respective ages for the purpose of the plot, of course.
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Review by KaptainKq Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Humorous. Not necessarily my cup of tea, though.

The use of pseudo-homonyms is effective; while it is difficult, at first, to figure out what Buck is talking about, it is not hard to connect the misheard words to the actual diseases and disorders. Zuska-Atkins felt like a bit of a stretch, though.
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Review by KaptainKq Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
The spelling and grammar seem alright. The pacing of the few story-lines I've read feel a bit off, though. A lot of the chapters are very short; it makes things feel a bit disjointed, to be honest. I understand by the nature of an interactive story, though, that that wouldn't really be your fault.
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Review of The Collapse (1)  Open in new Window.
Review by KaptainKq Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (3.5)
That's certainly an interesting personification of Grief; I probably wouldn't have thought of someone like him. I'd have pictured something more like the Grim Reaper, who was more specter than guardian, honestly, but I like your quiet, compassionate one better.
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Review by KaptainKq Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
An excellent guide for the uninitiated internet denizen.

A lot of these are fairly common-sense, to be sure, and fairly obvious to most people who've used a computer for some amount of time. However, items like these aren't FOR those people; these are for the newbies.

It's always helpful to offer guides to newbies, especially ones as concise and thorough as these.
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Review of POETRY  Open in new Window.
Review by KaptainKq Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (1.0)
Sir, there's nothing here... Nothing at all. That makes it a bit hard to actually review a portfolio of poetry.

If I might offer some criticism: You misspelled "poetry" in your description. Also, try to take off Caps Lock when you type. It makes you sound angry.
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