I love this as a concept; people do seem to chase technology for the sake of it. Not to say that technology hasn't added a lot to our lives but sometimes it does seem to detract; your story taking this point to the extreme. I thought it was really well written: I care about the characters; the story is fast paced and interesting. It takes a rather cynical view on our relationship with technology and humanity's inability to learn from its mistakes. My main criticism is that the characters were not described in huge detail, making it difficult to picture them but on the whole I really enjoyed reading this.
Awesome; I really like this. I am writing a story for this competition at the moment and this makes me think I would have to be amazing to win. The suspense you build in the dreams and the way I am forced to like and sympathise with Kevin is brilliant. I noticed one little spelling mistake; revived instead of received on line 6, but that is hardly important. I think this is one of the best short stories I have read.
I really enjoyed reading this. The world you create comes to life instantly and vividly; many mysteries spring into existence that grip me as the reader. The character's are interesting and unique. The concept of a nation of immortals controlled by some kind of dictator is not a story I have read before and I'm interested to see where it is going.
Clearly written by a man who is fed up with religion. Before I criticise let me just say that I agree; religion is embracing ignorance and calling it a virtue. It felt to me you could have continued on more with some of the points you made. I myself am an atheist and a physicist so I agree that science gives us no purpose, it is just our best way of describing the world around us. However I feel it is hugely unlikely that all religious people in the world are going to wake up one morning and say "Maybe the universe wasn't created by a perfect being who loves me as an individual". It just isn't going to happen, all we can do is live our lives following reason and logic and our own personal morality. I think you will just end up bitter and angry if you try and fix this problem.
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