Great idea! It's cool to see that somebody's actually taken an interest in what movie lovers would like to watch, instead of what the current trend is. I'll definitely check the website out, and see what there is to do. Good luck with the book, and the stories!
It's a good story, quite creative, but it is still a little rough around the edges. Some things I noticed:
3rd paragraph: "She regrets that she had not been able to as she had in the months before the king’s death." Your verbs don't agree. The first "had" should be "has". "And the genial girl would accept him as a kind offering." The huntsman himslef isn't the offering. Replace "him" with "this".
I'm also confused as to why the edit points stop after ten.
You might consider breaking this up into chapters.
I love your new take on the story, and the depth you've given to your characters, as well as your descriptions. Polish this!
This started off well, and could be a very good poem, but it needs a lot of work. It started out quite well, I liked the mood it put me in (but I think "You...are a treacherous one" is an unecessary sentence.) Then we began to hit snags.
For one thing, I think this poem could be made a lot shorter, as I found myself skimming towards the end, rather than reading. You could make it shorter by avoiding writing stanzas that convey basically the same idea. You could combine two or three stanzas that linger on the same thought into one that packs more of a punch.
Also, by doing this, you would still state your point, but avoid the overdramatics you border on from time to time.
Please don't take my rating as an insult, I wouldn't have reviewed you if I didn't think your piece had potential. Keep working on it!
My stepbrother is dyslexic, so this had special meaning for me. I think you have a very good story here, but a couple of things would make it better. First of all, in the intro, change it to past, instead of present tense. This fits in with the voice the rest of the story is presented in. Also, a dumb jock type like Chad would never say something like "succumbing to the whims of a charity case." Even so, "succumbing" sounds like Charlie is beating Ruth over the head with his so called whims, and probably isn't the best use of the word. Good luck polishing this, and keep writing!
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