Hi Maria, this is Stephe. I've just read your short story and it was very inspirational. It sounds so much like the game of life as there are many obsticles and distractions to hold you back, or discourage you, and it seems like with every step forward you take two steps back. But with hard work, determination, discipline, a strong will and faith in god, you'll succeed in whatever it is you're doing. And it's usually good to have a human shoulder to cry on. But if there's no one worth while to talk to, at least try to have an open relationship with god. The good lord will show you the way. A lot of people (especially in these times) are ignorant to god, or has lost faith in him after going through hardships. But god will never challenge you with a task that you can't handle, and it feels good to be his hands. Whatever that doesn't kill you will make you stronger. And you should never kick or step on a man when he's down. If anything, you're suppose to help that person when and if you can (like you did the way you described in your dream).
As far as the delivery of the story, I found no grammatical/punctuation errors, and it was presented to your audience in a servicable format. Despite it's short length, it delivered a powerful that got straight to the point.
Nice little tale as the main plot describes a young single woman, Skyler Adams, who's terrified of thunderstorms and hail. Good details were provided as you were able to explore into the main character's personal life a bit in this short story, describing the relation between Skyler and her little yorkie named MIlo (a gift from her mother), and explaining that she is seperated from her estranged husband. You also treated the storm as if it were a window dressing character too, as it provided the backdrop. The grammer and punctuation is on point as well. Good job, Newbie... and welcome to writing.com!
Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/daydream76
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.12 seconds at 10:22am on Nov 21, 2024 via server WEBX2.
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
