I felt that the overall opinion was that fat people need to get fit. I loved the stats you included. However, your writing seemed angry and negative. I feel that if the information was given in a more positive light, say with more solutions than get off your butt, which is vialible in most situations, it would not have been as uncomfortable to read. For example, for those not near farms or fresh markets how are they to get fresh foods?
I enjoyed the passage. I felt some of the sentence were not quite finished and didn't make sense on their own. For example ..The debate on illegal immigration is passionate, and if it were a simple problem we might have solved it by now one likes to think.. this was a bit difficult to read. It is thought provoking and I liked the fact that it was presented from several angles.
I enjoyed this. When it started off I wasn't so sure but the ending was written well, nicely done. I could picture their surroundings and the emotions involved. The dialogue was believable and worked nicely with the outcome. I found it to be easy to read and understand. I enjoyed reading this as my first passage on writing.com :)
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