I've only recently expierence this genre myself through a movie. I found it very intriguing but also stunning that it's so new and not so well-known. Your list of themes was very helpful and insightful into this newly found genre. I hope to see and hear much more about Steampunk. :)
WOW! What a thrilling and action-packed little tale... I'm blown away! :) You not only managed to capture the essence of your short perfectly in the title and summary, but execute it to a standard that would be near impossible to beat. Very well-done. Please continue to write more fascinating mystery thrillers....
I think you have an excellent start. :) But your ideas seem a little scrambled and not quite as clear as perhaps they should be. Up until the last paragraph, you did well summing up the situation with enough detail without being overly wordy. Then it starts to become confusing... Berici, the father joins some form of evil doers and makes... perhaps some form of blood pact with them? That's what I'm gathering, though I feel like I'm fishing - playing connect the dots with several blank spaces in between your points. I'm curiously wondering who the ominous 'they' are? Keep up the good work!
"A sky full of people who love me exist beyond a world that [I] was sure I would not come to miss." I believe you're missing an "I" in your second to last stanza. =) Outside of this small grammatical mishap, a lovely little piece. It's rather thought-provoking and flows nicely from one sentence to the next, stanza to stanza like a plesant melody. Simply Beautiful. Very heart-felt.
Although I must admit, I'm not entirely sure how it fits into the category of Fiction, it strikes me as more of a real world experience.
A wonderful and very original story. Wilfort, the transformist and Rinky, the cat are quite the pair! =) You really should do more with them. My only corrections are minor ones. Just do a quick read through and you'll easily notice where you're missing a few points of punctuation and simple little things like that. Otherwise, an enchanting read!
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