Burning Hatred Chapter 3 FINAL ONE

That morning Jake woke up in their shared hotel room, he was wearing the same skull-printed pajamas from the day before with one of Crimsion's shirts he secretly stole. The art on it seemed like something from a band. possibly a rock band from the 80s. Crimson was always a sucker for old-timey vintage shit. He still had a record player, and mixtape recorder and would constantly almost obnoxiously talk about the Beatles and how they changed music.


Jack tried to move but he found that he couldn't that idiot was clinging onto him like a lost puppy. His hair tussled and he slightly snored having not slept in way too long. After a bit of brute force and annoyed grunts, he was finally off. Jack walked over to the bathroom. The hotel was surprisingly nice and looked rather fancy at that. Typically overnight trips they were forced to use shitty motels or hotels if lucky but recently they had been doing a lot better financially speaking. Their clothes were scattered everywhere, surprisingly there were two beds but that clown purposely decided to sleep next to him. "Cute," Jack thought to himself before almost slapping himself for having such a stupid idea.


Jack opened the curtains and immediately regretted it, the sun was way too bright even though it was only 10 am. Jack opens the window and squints trying to make out what he is looking at. All the average crap, people, buildings blah blah. Jack wandered off the the nightstand beside their beds pulled out a cigarette and began to smoke. He smoked the whole thing in one breath, it was a trick his mom taught him. Not exactly but he would observe her.


His mom was old-fashioned but not in a punk rock way like Crimson more like a 50s housewife. His mom loved her pearls, wine, dresses, Chanel, and gossiping, or as she called it taking out the trash. I mean that was before it all happened. Jake was cast out by the age of 4. His dad had decided to walk out not in the right mind high on something. Although it didn't matter, what was done was done. He walked out the door with his mom chasing after him. He rambled about he didn't want no kid that aint his. "ill leave him, who cares hell just grow up to be a faggot anyways". He didn't remember much mainly because he was four at the time or maybe because it hurt too much to ever think about. "faggot" whenever he thinks about the way his mom said it, not a fuckin bit of passion for her son, her child.


Yeah, it's always too easy to "run and forget" as Crimson would quote. Jake coughed he hadn't smoked in a while and frankly he a disappointed for breaking his streak, but he needed it more than ever now. He walked over to the bathroom and brushed his teeth all while closing his eyes. He knew how much looking at himself could break his day. When he was done he slowly undressed careful not to look in the mirror. Jack stared down at his chest. At the scars that defined him around 4 years ago, Jack got top surgery though not bottom surgery, which seemed too scary.


Not thinking about it Jack looked up at the mirror by accident. Suddenly everything grew black, he could feel the void emerging and consuming and ripping him apart. "faggot", "What do you mean you feel trapped that's stupid", "gaybo", "sissy", "what a fucking weirdo let go before he gets a crush on us". Those voices echoed in his head. Before someone screamed "Why can't you just be normal" Where did I go wrong? The voice slowly faded into his mom's voice and turned into more of a desperate cry. Jack knew he shouldn't have felt bad or like a disappointment but he couldn't help it. Finally, Jack snapped out of it, shook his head, and got into the shower. The bathroom was a scary place for Jack so many bad memories. Like when Crimson almost overdosed and died in here, he laid unconscious on the floor while Jack gripped onto him sobbing on the phone with 911, or the self HATRED he felt whenever he even slightly glanced at a mirror and worst of all the need to wash off all the filth from his body in the shower.




The moment Jack stepped in, he grabbed the sponge and roughly grated it against his skin. It didn't matter that it hurt like a bitch or that his skin was red. Something that Jack never told anybody or even Crimson was that when he was out on the streets he sold off his body. tons of pervy men, bleck. Jack felt at his hips, he hated how feminine they seemed or how preyed upon they were by creeps and weirdos. Clean, clean, clean. Jack kept over and over repeating to himself as he tried to scrub away his body. But no matter how hard he scrubbed away it could never truly clean off the hands that touched him, or the things that were inside him. Or himself for that matter but he sure as hell would try. Jack felt himself almost throw up. Jack runs outside hastily turning off the shower with a towel wrapped around his lower waist while rushing to the toilet to throw up. He walked outside still dripping wet and cracked open a can of Diet Coke. He put back on a new pair of pajamas and crawled into bed with Crimson. Unexpectedly crismion immediately hugged him and snuggled up to him.



Jack's eyes began to water up, and he buried his head in the pillow, just having woken up yet feeling so drained and exhausted. Jack gripped onto Crimson, please don't leave me I can't have another good or goodish thing in my life leave me. That morning Crimson woke up first energized, typically he would need at least 2 Red Bulls just to fall outta bed but today was different. Crimson brushed his teeth, brushed his hair, and ran out the door but not before gently kissing Jack on the cheek. He could hate him in public and love him privately Crimson thought to himself, they balance each other out. Crimson wore black ripped baggy jeans, his typical scarf, a puffy half-zipped black jacket, a black tank top underneath, and a red beanie. The city was full of life, so no one came out at 7 am but 11 am was perfect. the place was painted with life, everyone had different places to be, backstories, and personalities. One guy was running down the street carrying a suitcase, wearing a suit, and on the call with someone seemingly very very annoyed.



Meanwhile, a black woman, with a blonde afro was crossing the street walking her lizard, wearing waist beads, bracelets, a long flowy skirt, and a knitted tank top. Crimson stopped at Jack's favorite chain restaurant "Void cofi". the store was covered head to toe in shades of green. The walls were a nice calming sage, the floor was white. There was a table neatly arranged along their windows. Most of the seats were occupied by people scrolling on their phones, going on a date, doing work, or playing uno against their friends. In every corner and ceiling corner were plants of all types, lemon tree, aloe vera you name it they had it. The lady at the front cashier had some incense lit as she was taking orders.




Crimson ordered a strawberry shortcake, an ice cap, and an iced vanilla coffee for Jack with cold brew foam. Jack would kill him if he didn't get him coffee but maybe this would help ween him off it. Soon after ordering Crismion rushed back to the hotel room. Jack was already out of bed and fully dressed standing by the door seemingly pissed off. You left me asshole, yea yeah shut it, princess, can't you throw a tantrum another time". Anyways I got you something Crimson handed Jack the vinalla coffee and cake. Aw, thank.. you..? Jack was seemingly caught off guard, yeah well I know how much to love your carbs Crimson commented. Yeah almost as much as I could love to shove your bullshit down your throat so you can choke on it like the cocks you suck asshole" Jack responded sounding dead.



Ight now let's go fuck face. They finally arrived at the building. Jack was supposed to be disguised as the guy's assistant. Jack walked into the guy's office nervous, the guy was balding, clearly had health issues, and was smoking a cigar. The office had an indescribable dark atmosphere. Behind his front desk in front of the elevator was a giant glass wall. Animal heads were mounted on the wall dear, bear rabbit anything and everything that failed to fight back. Finally sugar tits" Took you long enough the CEO said in a rough voice probably from all the nicotine. Jack stood in front of him awkwardly, he recognized damn well what he was trying to do. The way he said it his thirsty eyes.



Jack knew he was in danger and walked to run to scream to do anything but his feet were glued to the floor. The old man, slowly walked up to Jack panting heavily with a crazed look in his eyes. After all these years of killing and toughening up, he'd always be prey to a mere lamb. You know you were always my favorite so why don't you be a good bitch and-. Suddenly Crimsion swoons in from the corner and shoots him off. Jack stood here shaking, eyes widened seemingly terrified. Oh no im so sorry jacksy i should've stepped in sooner I needed his back turned I swear. No, it's- before Jack continued Crimson pulled him into a hug. It's okay doll your safe now. Crimson was 5'12 and Jack was 5'6, his arms safely and protectively wrapped around Jack's waist. He could smell him, he no longer smelled like booze more like coffee and sweets. Either way, it brought great comfort to Jack even if he'd rather die than admit it. Sadly a couple of minutes later, some annoying secretary bitch caught them packing up the body bag and said something about code red??


whatever that meant. So that's what got them here. Tied up in the back of some weird-ass warehouse until the police came they were left to die. God this fucking sucks, that stupid whore Jack rolled his eyes complaining while he tried to get out of the handcuffs. Heya calm down it's not all bad, hey why don't we play a game best part worst part? okay, I'll start best part, me leaving you worst part is being here stuck with you. You don't mean that it is clear when you lie your eyes get shifty and your voice is slightly higher pitched. Jack seemed startled and raised an eyebrow stalker much? he said chuckling. Hey, remember when we first met?
Yeah, you were the barista at the local Void cofi.
Yeah, and I thought you were some cooky art kid.
Hey, I wasn't that weird!!
eh, I disagree anyway you worse black studded belts, light blue hair, black ripped jeans, and an extremely baggy white t-shirt that practically goes up to your knees.
Yeah, and you would always stare at me looking so goddamn dead and annoyed.
Cause you wouldnt buy jack shit!! What would you even draw in that big-ass sketchbook?
Don't judge but I kinda liked you at the time and I needed a model so I would draw you. Cowboy, dress, hobo idk you were just a practice dummy.
Yeah totally not insulted Crimsion said sarcastically.
Remember our first date Crimson said laughing just at the thought.
Yeah, I asked you to be my muse and come to my studio apartment. And you got so fuckin scared.
You lived in a shitty apartment down the creepy ass alleyway!!
fair, Jack said still laughing.
Suddenly Jack stopped laughing and instead sighed. What happened to us?
You already know-
no, I mean what led you to this?
D-dont judge but. Crimson looked down. My parents were crackheads both abusive, if it wasn't for our rich uncle who kept sending up money we would be living on the streets. But they took advantage of him, pretended like they needed more money than needed, and spent most of it on drugs they quit work. 3 days a week my dad would head down to the local store, buy booze, and stare at the television mindlessly. Those days left me with more scars than I'd like to admit he said instinctively covering up his arms. One time he broke the bottle and knocked me out with it im surprised that im still okay to this day. I mean okayish, my mom was knocked out of the other couch to a had to remove tiny pieces of glass shards from my head myself.


Man, I was only 7 Crimson said laughing, but it turned into a depressive sigh. heh you know what my mom would do, she would inject ME with drugs, because I kept pestering her. Ever since then especially I stole drugs from them and used them on myself. Yeah, I know what a failure im suchas a dumbass. Hey, do you still remember when I almost overdosed and died that one time? well I know I had a lot of close calls with death but the one in the bathroom. I-im sorry... you deserve better. I am just so tired, every time I look at a bottle or pills or cocaine all I can still hear is my mom yelling at me for stealing her drugs and how much she HATED ME, DISPISED. To this day I can still feel the fire from her eyes burn my skin. I even still carry around a baggie of cocaine, of course, I've been clean for uhh year..? fuck that's good to say, but it's a nice memory. Heh and with alcohol, to this day whenever I see the shit I can still hear the doctors telling me "im sorry we lost her".



When I went to the funeral, it was an open casket, I didn't brush my teeth or hair I had laid around all day drinking. But even though the whole thing is a shitty fuzzy memory I can still remember staring at her corpse. Constantly over and over again repeating to myself, another good thing has died due to your failures what do you have now? I don't think I've ever felt that hollow, I couldn't cry or scream I wanted to hug her desperately and tell her everything would be okay. But I knew damn well everything wouldn't be. This wasn't a nightmare, no more Facetimeing, meeting her friends, tucking her into bed, and having her tell me she was too old for a bedtime story. All of it died in front of me..and I just let it. So you know that day when I overdosed I think I just wanted to feel close. Those same things killed so many people I cared about, and all I wanted was for it to kill me next. Jack was quivering, eyes widened bloodshot, pink blush sped across his face from all the crying. I am so so so so sorry, I should've been less harsh on you- Jack said looking down at head in his lap, he pulled on his hair stressed.




It's fine, I needed help anyway and I have been trying to get better anyways, even if it sucked losing you, it forced to be a better man for you. SUP FUCKERS. they bother whipped their heads around "SHIMEJI" WHO?? crimsion said now facing Jack. Yeah heard you too dumbasses got caught embarrassing. Shimeji had wild light cyan/blue hair. His suit was perfect and clean, except for a few blood spatters from the corner. He tucked his gun into his pocket, smoke still emerging. Took me like 5 fuckin shots to break that damn lock. Shimeji bent over unlocked the cuffs and whispered in Jack's ear, so are you guys dating yet, I mean im more than willing to if you don't mind". Jack no he mine no shit not?! Crimson looked over to him, well I mean your words, not mine but honestly im flattered- Jack's face was burning and bright pink he was so close to strangling the damn bastard. Heya Crissy couldn't you have broken the cuffs with your teeth, Crimson tried that and it worked in one shot. Jackass Crimson said teasing him but im your jackass Jacks responded sweetly. This time Jack reached for Crimson's hand, and Crimson held onto his hand without a second thought and not a shade of doubt in his mind.