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Rated: E · Other · Experience · #2051156
A short comic story I'm still working on.
Disconnected

SYNOPSIS

A dark tale for young adults of the near future, in which a somber man and a cheerful girl, must learn to overcome the despair that loneliness can create if not conquered by a healthy personal bond.  Even though 90% of society is linked together, or "Connected" through nanotechnologies and continuous streaming of information, there are those few who are not part of the "Connection." For these few, it is difficult to interact with peers or acquire employment in the government or private businesses. What follows is the interactions of one who is, and one who is not, which create difficulties or wrinkles in connections.

CHARACTER NOTES

MORRISON:          He should always have darker colors to sharply contrast Cath's warmth and cheerful disposition.  Heavy clothing even when inside.  As one not Connected, he should always look slightly out of place in regards to setting and other characters.
         (MOR for short in script.)

CATH:          She is Connected so there needs to be warm colors and more life when possible present with her and those like her. 
CORNELIUS: A yellow mid-size Labrador. When he is with Morrison in the past, he's dirty.  His fur is matted and dark, drab yellow.  When he is in the present or with Cath he is clean and his coat almost golden. 



PAGE 1 & 2 -MULTIPLE PANELS
1-2
Past: A darkened area with a soft light on two characters, man in mid thirties & preteen girl with large glasses.  Both have tears in their eyes, and they look like they are about to speak but can't.  View is slightly blurred, and only lingers on them for a few panels. Panel layout are at artist preference, just needs to assist in giving a sense of progression as the girl is moving.
It opens with the man & girl reuniting. Present:  She opens her eyes, with tears, to the sound of rain driving against the window, rumbles of thunder & flashes of lightening as she slowly lifts her large, thick glasses onto her face, ruffling her hand through her messy, mousey short hair.  She looks longingly toward the dark window.  The woman then walks down stairs with a large, shaggy yellow dog trailing at her heels, who was curled at the foot of the bed.
She heads through the spacious house, which appears very comfortable.  There are several framed photos on the walls depicting a happy family as she heads down the staircase.  She makes it to the refrigerator in the kitchen and opens it.

PAGE THREE- FOUR PANELS
3.1
Perspective from inside the refrigerator, various bottles, drinks & food containers are haphazardly placed.  She reaches toward a bottle of muskedine jelly. It can be labeled or not.


1. CAP:          I try not to think about making the sandwich. Although, making it seems to oddly reconnect me to him. It doesn't make sense but it makes sense as well, if there is any--oh never mind.

3.2
She moves to get a plate, flipping on a light, as the dog assumes a
leisurely position near the table that can only barely be seen.

2. CATH:          There are steps to this process Cornelius.  Only a few, but still there is an order to it.  That's what he always said at least.
3.3          
She is shown at a round table with the bread bag open, peanut butter
and jelly jars open, plate with slices of bread, as woman holds one slice, she applies the jelly.

CATH:          What do you think          Cornelius? Should something so simple           
be so methodical and precise?  Here you go boy, it's why you came down anyway. You knew didn't you?


3.4
She's holding the sandwich, which now is half gone, in one hand, With the other she offers a bit of the sandwich to Cornelius, as he leans up to receive it.

CATH:                    You miss him too, don't          you boy?

PAGE FOUR- THREE PANELS
4.1
Time jump should be subtly evident with some background coloring choices.  Perhaps even the same as in the first panel when the man & girl were together. Long horizontal panel of a man sitting crouched on an old, well-worn park bench with his hands clasped in front of him, fingers interlaced cupping a hook pipe. His body is tense, & his face shows concern.  There may be a few trees in the background, but without leaves. He should have a disorderly appearance with heavy clothing, but an air of nobility. 
         1. FLOATING CAP:          10 years ago

CAP:                    It's so cold.  It's          that deep, wet, miserable cold.  It           
seeps through you and then just settles like a wet dog on a once dry straw mat.  It cannot get worse than this, right?
4.2
A close up of his face. He now has the pipe between his teeth, as wisps of smoke crawl out of the pipe.  He grips it still with fingers interlaced.

3. CAP:          Ah how it burns, shortening my life, but it is warm and that is all I want. Thankfully, I can still wait in silence, without thousands of other thoughts interrupting me. Why has she not shown yet? I will only wait a few more min--
4.3
His thoughts are disrupted as he sees a dirty dog ambling toward him a few feet in front of a little girl hurriedly walking. She's wearing a checked blue & orange scarf, white long sleeve shirt, black mittens, ear mufflers, and black pants.  Her hair is short & she wears thick glasses.

4. CATH:          MR. MORRISON! I'M HERE! Don't leave yet, Wait!
PLEASE WAIT!







PAGE FIVE- FIVE PANELS
5.1
Square panel with Morrison standing in profile facing toward the inner gutter.  His arms are crossed and he looks almost kingly if it weren't for his clothes.  The bare trees and patches of snow are noticeable in the background, while he and the dirty dog are centered.  He looks annoyed at the girl.

MORRISON:                    Who is the mutt? He          looks pitiful. And you are late. I                                        almost had to reload my pipe          You know how           
dreadfully I hate that pipe. Time to go CATHERINE.
5.2
The girl looks unfazed and cheerful as she gazes outward at the reader.  There are no patches of snow in the background, & the colors are warmer with her

2. CATH:          It's Cath! C'mon Morrison, don't be upset.  I know you like that nasty pipe no matter what you say.  And his name isn't Mutt, it's, it's, Cornelius!
5.3
A long horizontal panel showing them walking toward the next page with a slight overhead perspective.  Morrison leads, with Cath and Cornelius a few paces behind. Dialogue is on each side if it looks ok, if not then fine.

3. CATH:          Mr. Morrison please don't take such big steps, remember I'm short!
4. MORRISON:          Walk faster then... or ride that dog.



5.4
The sky dims as they continue to walk. Cornelius is at Morrison's side. Morrison looks fondly at the dog.  Cath is beginning to look tired, but is still upbeat.

         5. MORRISON:          Your mutt stinks.  Did you just find him?
6. CATH:          Yep.  He was alone, just like me.  After awhile he just wouldn't stop following me, so I named him and gave him half of my snack and he hasn't left me since. (laughs)
7. MORRISON:          Cornelius eh?  Be responsible for him, Cath.
8. CATH:          Aye aye sir! He's my responsibility.
5.5
Cornelius looks back and up toward the reader with his tongue out and ears perked in a happy expression.
9. CAP-CATH (OP):          I think the old man likes you boy!
9. SFX:          BARK! BARK!


PAGE SIX SPLASH PAGE
They arrive at a two-story brick house.  Close to it is a well and a large pile of logs.  There is a smaller short house structure in the distance with wiring around it, and beyond it is a fence with cows. Characters' backs are to the reader. Cornelius' tail is swinging as Cath has a hand on his head.

         1. MORRISON:          This is my home.
         2. CATH:                    Wow it's actually kinda nice.  From what I'd heard
about stuff, I'd thought it'd be a wreck just like your clothes (chuckles).
3. MORRISON:          Well, it works for my needs.

PAGE SEVEN- SIX PANELS
7.1
Tall rectangular panels to show everything. Perspective is from inside the house as they enter.  A hat rack is on the left wall with hats and jackets dangling from it.  The walls are dark since the lights are still off.  Cornelius slips past Morrison's leg to enter.
         
1. MORRISON:          No! Do not let that dog in!  He will wreck the place.
7.2
The lights are on showing a neat while slightly empty and dusty living room with a large cushioned chair, a couch, a fireplace, and a desk and chair. Papers are all over the desk and floor near it.

2. CATH (OP):          Cornelius won't be messy.  We'll be careful, won't we boy? He wants to see your place!
7.3
From Cath's P.O.V., the next room is the kitchen, signified by a large refrigerator and a table with one chair.  There is a plate on the table with some food left on it and an empty glass nearby.
7.4
Still Cath's P.O.V., a bathroom without a mirror at the sink, but there is one leaning against the base of it.  The floor tiles are neutral color, but there is a nice blue & orange rug, like Cath's scarf.
7.5
She wanders up a long flight of steps.  On the wall are pictures of lots of different people. Cath looks inquisitively at the pictures and yells. P.O.V. focuses on a particular set of pictures.

3. CAP-CATH:          Are these pictures of Mom? She looks so different, calmer.
7.6
Cath stops in a large attic like room with a bed, dresser, closets, wardrobe, and a large window. The window curtains are a plaid blue and orange.  Cornelius is already nestled at the foot of the bed. Her face is shown with a look of concern.

4. CATH:          You look comfy Cornelius.  I sure hope I can be too... someday.

PAGE EIGHT- THREE PANELS
8.1
Tall panel with Morrison seated at the desk, smoking the pipe and gazing over a stack of papers.

CAP- MOR:          Why          did I take her in? Does she actually need me? All           
of these thoughts and feelings... I should be resolved by now.
         2. SFX:                    RUNNING WATER & BARKING
3. CAP-CATH (OP): NO, COR! Bad dog Cor! You're still wet!
                             
8.2
Cath enters with Cornelius.  They are both wet and Cath's white shirt is now dirty, but Cornelius' coat is a bit brighter.  Morrison's face is red, and he angrily jumps up.
4. MOR:          I told you not to bring that mutt in here, you foolish child.
8.3
Morrison's body lifts in anger, with his hands in his coat pockets.
5. MOR:          My house is neat and ordered. My house is just as I like it.  My house... is no longer just for me, is it?

PAGE NINE- SIX PANELS
9.1
Cath begins to cry and Cornelius paws at her leg to console her. Morrison sits down with his back to her and picks up some of the pages on the desk.

1. CATH:          Is it always my fault? I'm all alone now, and you don't even want me either. C'mon Cor, let's go upstairs.
9.2
She heads toward the stairs, while almost leaning on the dog for support she wistfully looks back at Morrison.
         
2. CAP-CATH:          It was supposed to work this time, but maybe it's why he's not like everyone else.  Maybe, he's just a mean, old lonely man!
9.3
Morrison is at the fire place, moving a few pieces of kindling into it.
9.4
A tall, thin panel showing Morrison striking a match, but it doesn't light.


9.5
Another tall, thin panel, and the match is still not lit.
9.6
Last tall, thin panel.  The match lights, and Morrison barely smirks.

PAGE TEN- TWO PANELS
10.1
Morrison sits in front of the small flame, picks up the pipe, and stares into the flames.
         
1. CAP-MOR:          Judith, why did you allow me to ruin something else?  Why did you not keep her?  I am unfit to do this job.  I am alone.  I am nothing--then again so were you. Nothing is ever easy, eh Judith?
10.2
Cath smiles at Cornelius as she wipes her teary eyes.  She has changed into a clean light blue shirt.

2. MOR (OP):          CATHERINE!  Come down if you want food, and we will make you a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.  There is a certain method to it that may be tough to grasp.
3. CATH:          He must be joking, that's so simple. Oh well, let's go boy.

© Copyright 2015 Jack Ransom (crimsonwolf7 at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
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