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Rated: 18+ · Sample · Other · #1918401
I was thinking about writing a full story but i wanted some feeback first.
Introduction

Vampires are misunderstood creatures of the night, females are locked away in dungeons on there first birthday. put in trances which ensure they only awake on there 16th Birthday (1600 years in real time) and then set out to find there true love and have children, but males take a different approach. They are trained to hunt, kill and charm on there 5th birthday so when the girls are released they will fall in love, however things dont always go to plan...

Chapter 1

It was a cold winters day and Tiffany Drake had just turned 16, her eyes fluttered in a slow way and eventually she was fully awake, after being asleep for 16 years straight she could finally be free. She slowly got out of her coffin which she had been hovering in hands on her shoulders since the day she was born. She gave her legs a little shake and then took a few steps forward, the next thing she did was approach her wardrobe, in the wardrobe was all her clothes all of the same gothic type style. She settled for black tights a dark red short skirt and a purple basque, this outfit complimented her pitch black curls which were knee length. After giving her hair a long brush for the first time in 16 years she was ready to set off, she laced up her boots unlocked the door and there infront of her was what she saw as a living hell. She fell to her knees in a state of pure shock, what used to be a graveyard was now just a muddy wreck with a few tombstones standing. She pulled herself up off the ground and walked towards a pale boy who looked about 17 or 18, he had pitch black hair and was playing a bass guitar which echoed in the wind. Tiffany had no idea if he was a human or a vampire however she knew it was destiny. Tiffany introduced herself and in the least obvious way possible looked to see if he was a vampire by looking for bite marks. “Could I?” She thought, it would probably look stupid if it went wrong but she had a plan. She slapped the boy on the neck and “Claimed” there was a fly and there WAS bite marks, “Your a vampire?” Yes” he admitted in a shy tone “Me to” She said and she apoligised for such a bad excuse. She found out the boy was called James and they switched numbers.At the end of the day when Tiffany went back to her dungeon she knew she was in love...

The next day Tiffany went in search of James and looked everywhere eventually she ended up in a strange looking town which looked abandond however there were lights switched on and a few people were walking up and down the street, one home on that street caught her eye. No one lived there and it was blocked off, the landlord had suspected that a sudden movement in the earth would of sent it tumbling to the bottom of the garden where there was a small river, however years on it had never happened, Tiffany pushed the door and it fell off its hinges, she pushed it back up but it wouldnt stay in place, she looked around the house for a while when she heard a loud BANG and a scream she ran into the room she heard the bang and saw James standing in that room with a gun, “Tiffany” he said sweetly dropping the gun acting as though nothing had happened, “lets go to the cafe down the road? They serve great cofees” Tiffany nodded in agreement scared that if she said no he would kill her, she was undead but they could still die, they get bit or are born vambaric and live forever however if they are murdered they are nothing but mortals and die... They sat down in the cafe and she sipped at her cofee. “Lets go home” James said in a sinister tone Tiffany followed in pure terror she planned to run home and hope James wouldnt bother her ever again but she knew it was to late for that, James had her by the hand and dragged her into the house locked the door to the bedroom, got out a knife and stabbed her in the heart. Love is the most deadly thing upon Earth....
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