Skinny-dipping in the Snow

Sometimes I do things that I probably shouldn't, but I still do. Well, I went to out with a friend in Nashville at German Town Cafe (which I highly recommend), which turned into too much wine. On a good note it also turned into her asking if I "wanted to do something crazy" to which I sarcastically replied, "Yea, let’s go skinny dipping."

At this point I expected for her to look at me in disgust and ask me to take her home, but what I got was a burst of enthusiasm, which not even I (the smooth talker I am) could extinguish.

Then came GREAT IDEA NUMBER 2, which involved a mandated stop at the package store for another bottle of wine.

We took off driving from Nashville to the majestic, beautiful, ball numbingly cold Piney River. On our way down came the first snow of the year. (I don't condone drinking and driving, but if you do it in the snow, it's great how the snow against the windshield looks like you’re going into warp speed in a bad Star Trek movie or something).
For all those who haven't been to the Piney, it is freezing cold in the middle of the summer. I didn't think it could get colder, but in January, in the snow it was cold.
Anyways, had fun swimming, needed to warm up. I had the perfect spot, a cabin that overhangs a bluff overlooking the river. Unfortunately, no pants meant no keys. I tried my best to break in, it being so cold and all, but the deadbolt was set. Then it came to me, sliding back door.

Unfortunately, wine has a way to make you forget. Forget things like . . . . big door jams locking the sliding door shut. In my efforts to climb back around and not look like a total dumb ass I hurriedly slid my way off the back porch onto what I believed at the time to be a rock on the side of the bluff, but what was in fact just thick vegetation.
Needless to say the "feeling like a dumb ass" was the last thing on my mind as I fell off the bluff into what I was sure to be the torturously cold river I had just came out of. Fortunately, a lower bluff approximately 15 feet down stopped that from happening.
I was lucky though because my face broke most of the fall.

Miraculously, I immediately jumped to my feet dusted myself off and climbed back up and around the cabin to where my worried friend was anxiously waiting. She said she heard some leaves rustling and was getting worried. (If she only knew).
Regardless, I ended up only having a small scrape across the bridge of my nose. Oh yeah and a leg cramp due to the fact the front seat of my mustang isn't very big.

Better Luck Next Time...