Untitled

He snapped the elastic band around his wrist
snap, snap
You saw the welts his actions caused
You saw the scars along his arms

No more, he vowed, as he strode across the room
NO MORE!  he cried, as he cocked the shaking gun

You saw his wide, frightened eyes
as he brought the gun to his temple
You saw the determined set of his jaw
before he pulled the trigger
You heard the trembling tone of his last whispered words
no more
Before the dreadful, sickening CRACK rang through the room

You never could understand what made him do it
But that moment changed you
Made you think, made you wonder
What if you had known?
What if you had asked?
What if you had cared?
Could you have changed his fate?
Or taken some of his pain?
All night you lay awake
Wracked with guilt, and a need to fix it
Somehow
The years pass, but you never forget
You never act, either
Sometimes you see a chance
But you never take it, too timid and afraid

Decades later, you lay on your deathbed
completely alone
No family alive, no friends who cared enough to come
As your mind wanders back to the lonely
boy, you understand why
You weep for lost chances to help
for chances to save lives
You know exactly how the boy felt
and you know you deserve this death
For how many such deaths had you indirectly caused?
You could've helped so many people...

but you didn't, and now this is your fate

You hear a shuffling outside the door,
then a gentle knock
'Come in', you rasp with one of you last breaths
In comes a coworker, one you had barely smiled at
'I heard you were...sick,' she says, 'and I
just had to come.  To say goodbye, you know.'
And so she sits, and in silence takes your hand
with your las rasping breath you whisper
'Thanks'
and wish her all the happiness and luck to be had
because she took a chance
and saved a life.