The Great Mushroom Adventure

Deb, Cody and I decided to go mushroom hunting. We packed some water, Cody's bottles, a couple diapers and the stroller and headed for mushroom country.

We arrived at our destination intent on finding lots of mushrooms. We put our goodies and Cody into the stroller and our quest began......

We found that Cody's stroller only has 4-wheel drive when the pusher has enough breath left in them. We pushed the stroller, we pulled the stroller, we lifted the stroller over fences, we carried the stroller over ditches etc etc etc.....

THEN IT HAPPENED!

Deb was carrying baby Cody back to his stroller, minding her own business, when suddenly, out of nowhere this giant, mean nasty wild rose bush jumped out at my friend and grabbed her ear! (OK...Deb walked into the innocent rose bush).

The wild rose bush dug it's huge razor sharp thorns deep into my dear friend's ear! Not just one thorn, but four of those nasty buggers!

Deb screams in sheer terror, "I'm stuck!" (she didn't really scream, just talked a little louder than normal, terror? yeah right).

Poor innocent Deb, holding a small baby in one arm and desperately trying to fight off the giant nasty monster with the other!

I raced over to my dear friend and baby son determined to free them from this nasty creature at all costs!

Finally after several hour of battle-ing (OK only minutes) I released my frightened friend and son from the clutches of evil.

THEN.......

We ran to safety and put Cody back in his stroller. Looking at my poor frightened friend to see how badly the evil creature had ravaged her ear, I was shocked at the severity of her wounds!

Blood cam pouring out of her deep wounds (maybe not pouring--but dripping quickly - not necessarily deep - it's just an ear, how deep could it be?)

Here we are miles away from the car (OK blocks, but it seemed like miles) lost in this vast dark jungle (not lost - it's the middle of the day - jungle may be stretching the truth - but there WERE trees!) My dear friend is slowly bleeding to death (yeah yeah stretching) and how do we stop the bleeding in time?

Being the clever intelligent person that I am I replied, "We can use one of Cody's diapers!" (maybe that was Deb's idea - I can't remember but she's the victim so I get to be the hero)

Just as the sun was setting (it was really only about 2 pm) two exhausted (that is true) girls and one happy baby emerge from the vast dark jungle (?)

One girl (the hero) is pushing the baby stroller, the other girl (the victim) is holding a size 3 Luvs diaper to her ear! (OK not the whole diaper, just a piece of it).

Finally our brave trio make it back to the safety of the car, proud that they had done battle with the meanest, nasty-est, creature the vast dark jungle (?) had to offer and the WON!!

On the way to the luxuary (???) of home the trio decided that they would again venture into the jungle to find the mushrooms they craved.....in a few days.

The End....
OH WAIT.............

The trio found 18 mushrooms
The baby is ready to go again
The victim is recovering nicely
The hero has a big head

This story REALLY is true! Deb has 4 little cuts on her ear, they did bleed, we did use a piece of diaper to wipe up the blood. Everything about the stroller is true, it was exhausting pushing it through the timber--but we DID have fun! And just between us....I think Deb should wear a football helmet next time....for her own safety!!



THE END
(for real)