"sister"

Why do you do this to me?
Why is this happening?
We lived together in the same house for so long. But yet I'm still not sister.
I guess we can only use this name by meaning relatives. I thought I knew you, but I was wrong.
I am still questioning if I'm wrong. I did what I did because I care.
Yes, I care about you.
I love you.
I want the best for you.
I don't want to see you this way. It hurts.
You hurt me bad.
For a long time I pretended I knew you.
I pretended you cared.
I didn't want to see the truth.
See that what you were was a lie
Or even what you are now is a lie.
I didn't want to believe it.
Because the title sister means you are real to each other. That we care for each other and love each other.
But now I'm feeling my part isn't returned.
I now am on the outskirts of your life.
You lost me.
I don't know if time can fix this.
I guess we will have to see.
I have caused pain to you I know.
But I tried to help.
In turn you have caused me so much pain.
But I patched it up and kept on moving.
I tried to heal, but each time you hurt the same wound.
Tears have been shed. Words exchanged.
What's done is done.
I'm thinking of leaving.
There is no need to stay and open up.
You lost me.
You turned your back.
You can call us sister on the surface, but what it contains isn't there.
Its nothing now but a term meaning we have the same dad.
There is nothing deeper.
We lost it or maybe never had it.
I think I played a game until I decided to see the truth.
So I'm letting go for now.
But my door is open just in case you would like to try to patch things up.
To start clean
To start new
Maybe we can use the term "sister" for its deeper meaning
and we can be REAL sisters.