Here I Am

Here I am
On drugs
Here I am, at a model MCC214-34 computer module typing away at keys, wearing a shirt that has a name on it that isn’t mine or is something I am interested in.

When did Quicksilver get better than JNCO?

Here I am, in my coat, reppin’ the FILA, in my LUGZ, in my Empyre pants. Here I am, in a sterile environment that looks like it is out of a Star Trek episode. All it is missing is sliding doors. Completely inoffensive colors surround me, beige, monochromes, pastels, etc. Here I am, all by my self, and when I’m around others, they are nothing but a figment of my imagination. This whole thing is a figment of my imagination. I walk around, in a daze, my memories shattered leaving me forever in the enlightened now, NOW?! What is going on right now? I am struggling to keep a letter that signifies my grade in a class that is teaching me things I know or I don’t need to know. If I don’t get a letter close to the beginning of the alphabet, I will not be staying at my current residence for they will exile me for my insignificant grades. I am a citizen trying to make good grades so my community admires me. I take extracurricular activities so my peers and my community will hold me on there shoulders, although my name is only drowned out by the others that are my equals or the ones that are better than me and have a better letter from the alphabet, or who can participate in athletics at an extra-ordinary level; that is more important because competition satisfies the primal hunger that these citizens are driven by. Maybe I will create artwork that has already been created so that others can give me a gold star on my forehead. Maybe I can create a product that these materialistic hungry citizens will want to buy.
Beat up your neighbor for a new toaster from Wal-Mart this Christmas.
Materialism is alive and well, so is competition. Both are primal desires.

Fellow cavemen, there is not much to know.

Here I am, paying taxes to some leaders who force me to get high letters in my classes. Leaders who have forced propaganda down my throat to make me like them. Here you are, with your family, sending your children to competition camps and having them tap into the television set, learning of our ways and learning of what they like and don’t like and what the leaders want them to know. Here you are. Here I am trying to be you.

I would love a family, so my children can carry on my bull-shit.

Here I am, walking alongside robot automatons, with logos painted on their cheaply assembled clothing and smiles painted on their faces, laughing…oh the laughing, coming from a distant place of delusions and fantasy about who they are, who they are going to be, who they know…

Disney and MTV makes your children. Lunatics!

Here I am, supplying money to an organization that attacks other countries that may have weapons we already have. Here I am, paying for the deaths of millions. Here I am, building a bomb bigger than the last one; using my money as hands to craft and shape the bomb of the future; the bomb to end all bombs.

-System of a down

Here I am, sounding like a stereotypical liberal. Rebel! Everyone else is doing it. Dark clothes, tattoos, piercing, dark makeup, chains, bats with nails in them, you name it, we have it, and everyone is buying it. If you want to rebel the cool way, then buy this shit.

Here I am rebelling against the rebels, smoking drugs to leave my body and feel uncomfortable, questioning this geometric space that I dwell in as I fall farther and farther into the dream world, thinking that I know that I don’t know anything. Thinking that this is all a figment of my imagination.

Copenhagen interpretation of modern quantum mechanics

Here I am, recycling ideas to you that have been around forever, in a way that you can relate, but you probably can’t, so I do this for my self. I do this so that maybe God can understand that I called his bluff.

Religion isn’t real, it’s a false lie over true despair.

Here you are, suited up and ready to fight and die for your leaders of this giant peer tribe. It goes from the purple mountains majesty to the shores of triple E and you are going to kill those that want to kill you or kill your self for the others who want you dead.

You’re a modern day nazi.

Here it is. Two eyes, yin and yang, 1 and 0, good and bad, you name it, it comes in twos and you can’t survive at .5. Live in the body, choices, you die, live in the mind and hide in the sky.

This is a computer simulation.

Right wing, left wing, coke, pepsi, Forget that our gas prices go up in tourist season and that addictive cigarettes get taxed to fuck and everyone still smokes the same amount. Then commercials are shown displaying how "CIGARETTES" are bad…CIGARETTES are bad...truth.com…

Here you are, blowing up the sky, flying planes into buildings, conjuring up lies, conjuring up hurricanes with technology the mass public has only seen in sci-fi movies but are very real. Here you are, in your suit filled with cigar smoke, with your big smile that’s chewed through a fine meal every night and you think you are hot shit and it’s a lie…a great big lie that is going to kill us all, just because you wanted a bigger dick than everyone else. Here you are, showing us that God wants us to go to war so we all believe as you sprinkle your fairy dust on us that falls from the comm. trails in the sky.

I’ll die for a cause.

Here I am sounding stupid because language limits my ability to address certain ideas, so I use poetry and prose.

Lets go to heaven.

Here we go, monkeys with ipods, chimpanzees with cell phones, guerillas with tracking devices imbedded in the top of their hand. Here we go, theorizing about things we can’t know and things that can’t be told to us. Things we’ll never figure out are things that are best left unsaid. And the pursuit of truth is drowned in conspiracy and replaced by the pursuit of happiness.

Our work now will benefit us in the future somehow.

Here I am, walking around, staying warm, eating food, looking for pleasure on a giant rock in outer space with no living thing around for light years, or maybe just nothing around, all by my self, all by your self, never knowing, always believing, or dead. Dead because living killed you and it was the only way left to rebel because everything had been done already.

Teenage suicide is at a record high….high....boy am I high....

What am I doing? What the fuck are you doing?
I’m just chillin, what’re you doin?