 Romance/Love: September 18, 2019 Issue [#9763] |
This week: It's a Matter of Trust Edited by: Dawn Embers  
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Romance/Love Newsletter by Dawn
When it comes to romance, trust is a major issue that comes up in different levels. How you use the issue within the story can help with plot and character. |
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"Trust is the glue of life. It's the most essential ingredient in effective communication. It's the foundational principle that holds all relationships." - Stephen Covey
Trust is a big issue often but in particular with romance. Relationships are built upon trust and the conflict that comes often can rise due to either related problems or the resolution may rely on the existence of the particular bond between the characters. Whether the story/relationship is sweet and innocent or falls within the category of erotica including domination/submission, trust can play a factor. We have to trust on many different levels with our loved ones, people we deal with on a regular basis and even to a degree strangers. It's a difficult commodity in a way and yet if you look at it from a different angle, one we give out on a regular basis too.
"I trust you: That's huge. That's truth. That's real love. Everyone uses 'I love you' so loosely." - Justin Chatwin
How can you use trust within your romance story? There are many ways under the sun but let's consider a few particular options in order to develop some conflict, which is important for any length of story. If there is a question of whether the main character can trust the love interest that can create an internal and external form of conflict. How much they question the issue will dictate the struggle involved in building trust along with what it will take to overcome the obstacle in a believable fashion within the length of the story. If the characters have a history together, there might have been an issue that happened in the past to cause a break in trust, or there might be a current chance, something to make them question what they know and believe about the person they used to know.
Damaged trust can make a difficult problem to overcome in a romance, so it can be a challenge finding the right balance. We rely so much on trust that at times we don't even recognize that's what is happening and the characters are going to be similar because we see things going a certain way in the story and write them. The character might night see the big picture of the romance laid out before them or even notice the trust that comes along with any particular choice.
Resolution doesn't have to be the complete end all, going to trust until the end of time for every story. The happy ever after forever approach might dictate a more finished element to the end. However, more now accept that this is the end of the paper book or section of screen and that the characters are settled for now. Leaving a little room for development in the relationship can work too depending on the story or when leaving room for a sequel. However, it has to be something that makes sense based on the characters and the extent of the conflicts involved.
Consider the topic of trust when it comes to the story you're working on now. Does it come up? Is it an obvious issue or more of a subtle one? How do you use trust within your romance story? Whatever way you find to develop and question trust within the romance, don't stop now. Whether it's within the title (search for romance books and trust, you'll find a few), a question for the main character, an issue for the love interest, the main plot or as a backdrop, there are plenty of ways to use the concept of trust within your story. Trust me.
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How do you use trust within your romance story?
Last month I wrote a newsletter about the use of parents. Here are a couple of comments sent in over the topic:
Comment by Quick-Quill 
Funny you posted this. I just read s short romance (maybe 2500 words) Where a guy meets a girl they fall in love, he asks her to marry him but she says he has to ask her father. They meet and he says yes and they kiss. The end. I felt it was too much of a stretch to be believable, but it worked.
- Probably depends on how they write that. I know in real life there are some families who still like the follow that tradition but they aren't as strict to where they would say no, just need to be asked. Though if it's too easy for a story that does seem lackluster as we all appreciate conflict.
Comment by jim1184 
This is a good reminder on a point, that can be used in other genres. I write SiFi and fantasy even here a little romance creeps in. That is why I subscribed to this news letter. So I can pirate Ideas, in a topic I am weak in. I have always known that SiFi has been a leader in show casing equality between the sexes and races. The other day a classic military space opera surprised me with a very smooth intro to the ship's captains sexuality, when he was grieving over a lost love. He had all the same problems as anyone else. One of the memories was meeting the parents. I like how future societies can be presented as advanced or not.
- Thanks and true, many aspects can be used in different genres. Would be interesting in a speculative fiction story about the parents including different cultures and approaches. Memories are a great source within a story too in order to show particular elements of the story and the characters.
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