 Comedy: April 19, 2017 Issue [#8238] |
  Comedy
This week: Nothing Funny Happened -- The Sequel Edited by: Ẃeβ࿚ẂỉԎḈĥ  
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Did I say nothing funny happened?  Well, had it not been for the past week’s news, I would just be grumbling about April 15th, which happens to fall on the 18th, this year. Yes, the tax man cometh -- or cameth by the time this newsletter reaches your inbox. Thank goodness for little distractions such as this one ... |
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Come Fly With Me!
By now, we’ve all heard, and heard, and may I dare to repeat Heard about the passenger, a doctor, who was dragged kicking and screaming off United Airlines, thanks to a passenger who recorded the whole ordeal.
Now, I know this -- even IF this guy had some issues somewhere in his past, that shouldn’t factor in at all in this situation because he was allowed to board the plane. The bottom line, which is affecting United's bottom line is, it never should have been handled the way it was.
Suggestion:
If a passenger states you’ll have to drag him off the plane kicking and screaming, don’t take it as a challenge.
(Think auction) Hold up your finger and say:
Step right up, ladies and gentlemen -- Give up your seat for, let's say $2000? Do I hear an "I'll take" for $2000?
 Hmmm ... okay! What if I throw in a hotel room and free meal? Ummm, any takers, now?
 How about $3000, a four star hotel room, dinner and mini-bar privileges?
 All-righty, then. I see you like to play hardball.
 $5000, a free ticket to travel anywhere, a five-star hotel room, breakfast, lunch and dinner, unlimited mini-bar, a guaranteed seat on tomorrow’s earliest flight to your destination, plus you will be upgraded to First Class! What do you think, now? 
 I’m willing to bet that the woman who was recording the unfortunate display of passenger removal, would have dropped her cell phone and called out, "Me! ME! I’ll take the offer!!!" And it would have been the end of the story.
 But, Noooooooooooo! They took the challenge. After all, they are all powerful when it comes to what they consider an unruly passenger. So, they decided it was better to have one of their airline employees take that guy’s seat rather than raise their offer, or heaven forbid, get the employee to his destination another way. And you know what? They could have had a double win situation and ended the drama that would not end well. Since the passenger obviously refused their lower monetary compensation, they could have said "okay then, thank you for flying United," and opened the higher offers to ONLY the other passengers. Who knows? Perhaps the guy would have sued them anyway for excluding him from the grand compensation package. Nevertheless, we can't "unsee" that video, and as of this writing, United is the most hated airline in country.
 Well United you stood, and perhaps with a little more time and a lot more money spent on public relations and law suits, plus all of the passengers' ticket refunds that were on that flight, and trying to recoup from the plummeting stocks, you may even fly again! 
Yup, it’s a wrap, for this edition of the Comedy Newsletter.
Until next time--laugh hard, laugh often!
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| |  | Molena (ASR)
This is a funny short story about the worst airplane-seat partner. Ever. Please review !
#501115 by Singaya  |
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#1020472 by Not Available. |
| | | Rotten Coke (13+)
In this story I try to look at the funny side of my journey from London Heathrow to Newark
#1921580 by lad24 |
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#1476116 by Not Available. |
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Dragon is hiding 
 Love how it all worked out so well in the end! 
Indeed, so am I!
Thanks for the feedback Flamebreather! 
QPdoll is Grateful
Excellent newsletter Web Witch! I'll have to get your recipe for cooking corned beef, if your willing to share.
Thank you! Sure, you can email me for the tired tried and true, "So you think you can cook a corned beef like you are Irish? " recipe. Don't tell anybody else, though. I don't don't want to spend the rest of the year with a flooded inbox with peeps asking me to pass it along.  
Acme
Oh my, talk about hoisted by your own petard! Trust you to cook up something so tasty that your caldron will be bubbling with corned beef for the next 365 days! Sounds like you had a fabulous St. Pat's.
Geez, thanks, Acme -- I actually had to go look-up the word "petard." I'm truly enlightened, now.
Thank you for the feedback, kiddo! 
papadoc1
Its all true, dear WW! I DID suffer through years of lightly-cooked corned beef, which had the amazing properties of "flubber", believe it or not. It seemed that each time I 'dined' on Mother's attempts at this Irish fare, my jaws would snap back UP with three times the kinetic force that I applied while biting DOWN! Amazing, I tell you, simply amazing. I should have garnered Mother's recipe and sold it to the military. I understand that tracked vehicles oftentimes need superior rubber in which to fight wars the world over! But that great (and glorious) day arrived, sure enough, whereby your experimental beef was found to be totally impressive - and how I can vouch that many friends of mine all are convinced that they too have sampled the world's Greatest Corned Beef - ever - for all time! Thank you for this kindly NL, always fun to read, even funnier (usually) to experience.
 My pleasure, Doc! And thank you for the kind words about my corned beef. And no -- I'm not making another one soon. 
Whata SpoonStealer 
Webby, that's funny! I make corned beef with potatoes and cabbage in the crockpot. I mean, it's pretty funny anyone would NOT make it fall about easily. Poor hubby. But aren't you the domestic Irish goddess
 Thank you, Whata. I try -- I really try! 
Quick-Quill 
I LOVE corned beef and make it every year in my crockpot. It comes out tender and cooks all night. Well, it did when I had large pieces of meat not the tiny little pieces they sell now. I have a number of friends who have had meatloaf overcooked by mothers and will turn away if you tell them you're cooking meatloaf. My sister in law had this wonderful recipe that we all make. It has become such a favorite among friends the word got out. My husband was asked to make it for a dinner at our church's camp meeting. It was such a hit we serve it once a week every year. Even the connoisseurs of meatloaf say it's the best they've tasted. When you're willing to try another cooks version of something, you may find it tastes better than what you're used to. My hubby is a wonderful cook.
Yeah, what's with the tinier sized corned beef? I was wondering that, also. I end up buying several of them.
Sounds like you have a great tradition going.Meatloaf can be a fine, tasty comfort food or a wretched flop if overcooked. Seasoning is very important, also. 
Thanks for dropping by with a comment, I appreciate it!
LJPC - the tortoise
Hi WW! You're so sweet to have braved corned beef for WL! I'm glad it turned out okay despite the fact you were a corned-beef-cooking virgin! 
~ Laura
 AND
Thank you Laura!
Back in Time:
Elfin Dragon-finally published Comments from "Comedy Newsletter (February 22, 2017)"
Thank you WW for making me laugh. Here in AZ we don't get this kind of hilarity going on. The only thing we have is the "Stupid Motorist Law" which states...any motorist dumb enough to go around a posted flash flood barrier and gets stuck will have to pay for their own rescue. And we do get several during Monsoon Season.
Monsoon? Do you have a Staples there? If so, it was probably open for the gathering of "stupid motorists."
Thank you for the feedback, Elfindragon!
Thank you for your feedback, folks! We editors really appreciate it.
See you next month!
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