 Spiritual: November 11, 2015 Issue [#7315] |
  Spiritual
This week: Quick to Listen Edited by: SophyBells  
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Hi, I'm SophyBells ~ your editor for this edition of the Spiritual Newsletter.
The Rev. Scotty McLennan, author of the book Finding Your Religion, compares humanity's innate need for spiritual searching to climbing a mountaain. In his view, we are all endeavoring to climb the same figurative mountain in our search for the divine, we just may take different ways to get there. In other words, there is one "God," but many paths. I honor whatever path or paths you have chosen to climb that mountain in your quest for the Sacred.  |
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"Quick to Listen"
James 1:10
You must understand this, my beloved: let everyone be quick to listen, slow to speak, slow to anger.
Michael Lerner in Jewish Renewal
The central mantra of the Jewish people is “Hear, O Israel.” Listen.
The command implies that one can still hear, that the revelation is still happening.
Phillip L. Berman in The Journey Home
In my own life I’ve found that when I am able to listen carefully enough to anyone, listen to them with my full heart, then the walls of separation come crumbling down. Martin Buber believed that such “active listening” is not only the secret to fulfilling relationships between people, but a vital passageway to faith.
David Spangler in Parent as Mystic, Mystic as Parent
Listening is the gateway to understanding.
There’s a lot written about the importance of being understood. I don’t suppose it’s going too far to say that it’s a basic human need, not far removed from our need for food and water and shelter. The experience of having someone listen to us and understand us is precious, and relatively infrequent. Short of having someone agree with your opinion or validate your perceptions or approve of your behavior, being listened to – heard and understood without preconceptions or judgment – is deeply satisfying. It cam make it possible for us to grow and mature as little else can.
Listening well to one another has potential for making peace and building cooperation in the world. Recognizing my own need to be heard and understood is an essential prerequisite to being able to listen well to someone else. In our own profound and often unmet need to be heard, we are prone to forcing our thoughts and opinions on others, assuming subconsciously that because I need to be heard it is therefore your responsibility to listen. That’s rarely true or practical. The people we deal with in the normal course of our day are not likely in a position to hear what we need to say while concentrating on a project at work or standing in the checkout line at the grocery. But that very gift is something we might choose to offer when the opportunity presents itself as an act of grace in the world. Yet we need to be aware of our own mind – our own needs and prejudices and ignorance and emotions – if we are going to choose to listen well to another.
Recently I had an exchange with someone about a post on Facebook regarding what can be a controversial "hot-button" topic. The person disagreed with me on the issue, and wanted to engage in dialog about it. To be honest, I did not really want to have the conversation with her about the issue. I knew the person was going through a particularly hard time in her life, and the last thing I wanted to do was argue with her about something while she was in the midst of a crisis. So I "listened" carefully to her as she private messaged me, reading her replies several times before answering, took my time replying to her, and was more careful with my typed words than I usually am. While I felt as strongly about my position as she did about hers, I tried not to be provocative in my responses - I spoke my truth, without questioning or insulting hers. As a result I discovered that by being respectful and caring for her well being during the conversation, an argument did not ensue and we discovered we had more in common with our beliefs than I originally assumed. Listening truly was the gateway to understanding, as David Spangler says.
What if I employed that kind of care for everyone I am in dialog with – not just those people I happen to know are struggling, but everyone I encounter? There is a saying – “Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about.” And it is so very true. I know that I was humbled by the interaction and how it turned out – how we had a dialog instead of an argument, how we had more in common than I imagined, and how she even got me thinking a bit differently about an issue I feel strongly about.
While my position did not change in the end, I realized that when we dialog with someone about any hot topic, if we calm down our emotions and really listen to one another, we can get a lot further in our conversations. My views did not change, but my tone in talking about them changed significantly because I did not want to upset my friend. And the exchange inspired me to try to be just as careful with others – because whether or not the person I may disagree with is going through a family tragedy or not, everyone is fighting a battle we know nothing about, and in the end, that kind of respectful listening gets more positive results than yelling, interrupting, name calling, or arguing. It can create relationships instead of tearing them down, which really is the only we are going to survive. Would that we could employ this kind of listening elsewhere – in our homes, our work places, the political arena, and globally in places like the Middle East and even here in the US.
This week, if you are so inclined, take an opportunity to listen to someone else, deliberately choosing to put your own mental needs and priorities on hold for a moment or two, and simply listen with the intention of understanding another person’s experience. You may excuse yourself from the responsibility to fix a problem, or to correct a misconception, or to share your experience in response. Recognizing those inclinations will enable you to set them aside for that encounter, and just listen to understand.
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Below you'll find some spiritual offerings from other WDC members. Please let the folks know if you read their piece by leaving a thoughtful comment or review. I realize I post mostly poems, but that is because it is tough to find other types of spiritual writing on the site. If you have something you would like me to highlight, please do share it with me, thanks!
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Here is a response to my last newsletter "Spiritual Newsletter (October 14, 2015)" about "Life Before Death:"
From Kanish ~ we got this! 
What I really wish, right from my heart is that Poverty may be eradicated, completely, to the last person. How horrible is it, if we actually think, that here we are enjoying life in all its glory but there is somebody, maybe miles away, who had a meal some 5 days before. Breaks my heart...
Breaks mine as well - a lovely wish for humanity.
    
From CHRISTMAS cub-BELLS R RINGING! 
I pray every night for a cure for cancer. My parents both died of it... my mom at 28, and my dad at 74. I've known of too many leukemia cases with children and too many women who died from breast cancer. I would love to see a cure discovered in my lifetime. Also, Alzheimer's Disease is another close to my heart, as my grandchildren have recently lost their other grandma, 68, to this horrid disease. She never knew her grandchildren and that just breaks my heart. Oh-my-goodness, my feedback is much too depressing... Sorry! I just feel so strongly about discovering cures for diseases such as these. Thanks for a thought-provoking newsletter, Sophy!
Thanks Cubby - I wish for the same, having also lost loved ones to cancer. And Alzheimers must go too! No need to apologize, I agree completely about these terrible diseases, and wish they would be eradicated.
From Pita
I really enjoyed this issue, in the saddest of ways. As I type, Jimmy Carter's autobiography is sitting on my nightstand, but I cannot bring myself to read it. Not yet. I was in the first group of 18 year-olds allowed to vote, and it was a presidential electoral year. I voted for President Carter, and he has been a hero to me ever since.
For years I thought "That's how to be a Christian," because he never really talked it he walked it. And his idea of God and the world provided a seat at the table for everyone, people of all and no faiths.
And now I think, "That's how to be a human being." He is the best and brightest of us all, and now we get to stand in admiration at his courage.
Amen - beautifully said. President Carter was my first presidential election too, and he got my vote!
From Apondia  :
I have seen or heard more than one news interview that with Jimmy Carter. I have also read one of the books he authored about the middle East and found comments about his peace ideas. He is a very sincere person and cares about leaving a heritage for human kind. It was nice to see this information in your newletter.
Glad you enjoyed it, thanks for writing in.
From ANN Counselor, Lesbian & Happy
A wonderful message, to consider what we hope for before death. My thoughts turn first to family, I hope each of them will be healthy and living happily before I go. Too often those like me who are so very healthy late in life as the eldest of paternal and maternal families, and we wonder who else will precede us. My greatest hope is that my children, grand and great grandchildren will be living happily with their families before I die. If that happens, I'll die feeling blessed. Of course, I hope for world peace, especially in the Middle East and Africa, but the nature of humans tell me now that cannot happen. If only...
ANN
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If only ... thank you for sharing.
From paeggan
I would like to be like a blackhole in space, ever growing larger by learning and doing more varied things in life before I die.
P.Watson Guise
Very interesting wish - I like that!
From Olivia
Dear Sophy,
I want to continue reading your newsletter, glad I found it! I need all the inspiration I can get. I will be writing on this subject very soon. Just joined on the 14th of this month and I am so grateful to God, who I feel directed me to this site. I really needed at this juncture of my life.
So glad you found the Spiritual Newsletter, and hope it continues to nurture you.
From Elfycia Lee ☮ 
For now, what I want to do is pretty simple. Just want to complete one novel. For now.
A great goal - are you NaNo'ing? Good luck!
Please keep your comments and suggestions coming! Until next time! SophyBells |
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