 Comedy: November 09, 2005 Issue [#705] |
  Comedy
This week: Edited by: Beyond the Cloud9  
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Comedy a.k.a. funny stuff.
Whatever your writing style or reading preference, comedy finds its way into everyone’s life in some form. Take time to look around and see the humor in life. Learn to love and laugh at yourself, and laugh with others.
This newsletter is designed to give you tips and entertainment, but mostly to put a smile on your face!
Your editor this week is Beyond the Cloud9
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| ASIN: 0996254145 |
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Amazon's Price: $ 12.95
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I love to read about unusual inventions. This was one that was both weird and just a bad idea all around:
After browsing through way too many absurd inventions, I came up with my own and I will now attempt to pitch it to you.
Are you tired of your heart being broken to see yet another dead bird on the road, tragically struck by a speeding vehicle? Are you sick and tired of cleaning off carcass remains off your newly washed tires? Does it frighten you when children unexpectedly run out in the roadway, causing you to slam on your brakes to avoid hitting them? Would you like to see all the wildlife, pets and children protected and not slaughtered along the streets? Well rejoice because the new “Tunnel Drive 2005” is the answer to your prayers!
Tunnel Drive protects the wildlife, pets and children from easily entering into busy streets by creating a “tunnel” along roadways! Imagine your own pet or child protected from the neighbor’s monster truck or speeding motorcycle! Tunnel Drive 2005 can save their life!
Tunnel Drive 2005 comes in two practical materials: plexiglass and chicken wire. The plexiglass version comes in 7 alluring shades to compliment your neighborhood or city road: sky blue, rose red, lovely lavender, sunset orange, sunflower yellow*, window tint gray* and clear.
In addition to keeping your pets and local wildlife safe from untimely deaths and injuries, resulting in high vet fees, Tunnel Drive 2005 can also provide cooler conditions for your vehicle! With Tunnel Drive 2005’s exclusive tints, you can drive in temperatures up to 20 degrees cooler, which is especially helpful during those long, hot summers. Tunnel Drive 2005 also comes with an optional UV protectant**, protecting you from harmful, damaging UV rays.
You might think an amazing invention like this would require extensive labor to set up. You are absolutely correct! Which is why when you request Tunnel Drive 2005 for your area, we will send a crew out to you to survey your streets, and then later to set Tunnel Drive 2005 up for you!
I’m sure you are wondering how vehicles will access driveways to homes and business. No problem! Tunnel Drive 2005 has doorways that are motion sensitive and open and shut on their own, allowing you freedom to go wherever you choose.*** There are doorways setup in the same fashion for pedestrians as well. With Tunnel Drive 2005 commuting is easy!
Now that you know how wonderful Tunnel Drive 2005 is, you’ll want to get it in your community, workplace and city as soon as possible! Don’t let price be an obstacle, because Tunnel Drive 2005 is affordable, with every person affected paying only $19.95 per month for 5,236 months! Tunnel Drive can even work with your mortgage company or landlord to get the payment included in your monthly mortgage or rent!
Don’t delay! Call now to get more information on bringing Tunnel Drive 2005 to your area! You will be glad you did!
*Sunflower yellow and window tint gray can be specially made upon request at an additional charge. A combination of all colors, resulting in a rainbow effect, can be created at an additional charge.
**UV protectant is optional and will require additional fees and manufacturing time.
***Driveway access doorways are free of charge, up to 10 entrances per square mile. Pedestrian access doorways are free up to 4 per square mile. Additional accesses will be charge per access.
(Sorry no image available)
How convincing was I? Not very? Oh, now! Can you do better? Here’s a challenge: you come up with a crazy invention and pitch it to me. I’ll even make a contest out of it and you’ll have nearly a month to complete it. I’ll feature the winners in next month’s newsletter!
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Have an opinion on what you've read here today? Then send the Editor feedback! Find an item that you think would be perfect for showcasing here? Submit it for consideration in the newsletter!
https://www.Writing.Com/go/nl_form
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| ASIN: 0910355479 |
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Amazon's Price: $ 13.99
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  Questions & Comments
karabu Writes:
I'm on a 2 year old costume hunt myself. She was 2 1/2 weeks old for her first halloween, and I'm proud of the costume we made for her. She was a spider (black pants and shirt with four extra 'arms' attached). I drew a spiderweb on a white t-shirt for myself, and carried her around that way. Aren't kids fun! Thanks for the great newsletter!
You've been hunting for a costume for 2 years? Wow!  The spider costume sounds cute and I'm learning that kids really are fun!
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| ASIN: 0995498113 |
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Amazon's Price: $ 19.95
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