Action/Adventure: September 21, 2005 Issue [#625]
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Action/Adventure


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  Edited by: W.D.Wilcox Author IconMail Icon
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Table of Contents

1. About this Newsletter
2. A Word from our Sponsor
3. Letter from the Editor
4. Editor's Picks
5. A Word from Writing.Com
6. Ask & Answer
7. Removal instructions

About This Newsletter


         You hold great powers. Trust yourself. Write what you feel. You’re the only one who can do this.
--billwilcox


Word from our sponsor



Letter from the editor


Tuning your voice.

Of all the effects created by writers, none is more important or elusive than that quality called "voice." Good writers, it is said time and again, want to "find" their voice.

But what is voice, and how does the writer tune it?

"Voice is the sum of all the strategies used by the author to create the illusion that the writer is speaking directly to the reader from the page."

Voice is the "sum" of all writing strategies. Think of a piece of sound equipment like a "Graphic Equalizer." This is the device that creates the range of sounds in a sound system by providing about 30 dials or levers, controlling such things as bass and treble. Push up the bass, pull down the treble, add a little reverb to configure the desired sound.

So, if we all had a handy-dandy writing voice modulator, what ranges would the levers control? Here are a few, expressed as a set of questions:

1. Does the writer use street slang or the logical argument of a professor of philosophy?

2. What "person" does the writer work in? Does the writer use 'I' or 'we' or 'you' or 'they' or all of these?

3. What is the range and the sources of allusions? Does the writer cite a medieval theologian or a professional wrestler?

4. How often does the writer use metaphors and other figures of speech? Does the writer want to sound more like the poet, whose work is thick with figurative images, or the journalist, who only uses them for special effect?

5. What is the length and structure of the typical sentence? Is it short and simple? Long and complex? Or mixed?

6. Is the writer trying to be objective, partisan, or passionate?

7. What are the writer's frames of reference? Does the writer work with conventional subject matter, using conventional story forms? Or is the writer experimental?


Consider this passage, on the liberation of Buchenwald concentration camp. Read it aloud to hear how it sounds:

We entered. It was floored with concrete. There were two rows of bodies stacked up like cordwood. They were thin and very white. Some of the bodies were terribly bruised, though there seemed to be little flesh to bruise. Some had been shot through the head, but they bled but little. All except two were naked. I tried to count them as best I could and arrived at the conclusion that all that was mortal of more than five hundred men and boys lay there in two neat piles.

The writer grounds his report in the language of eyewitness testimony. I can hear in his report the struggle between the professional reporter and the outraged human being. The level of language is concrete and vivid, describing terrible things to see. He uses a single chilling metaphor, "stacked up like cordwood," but the rest seems plain and straightforward. The sentences are mostly short and simple. His writing voice is not neutral — how could it be? — but it describes the world he sees and not the emotions of the reporter. Yet he places himself on the scene in the last sentence, using the 'I' to give no doubt to the possible deniers that he has seen this with his own eyes. The phrase "all that was mortal" sounds like it might have come from Shakespeare. This brief reading shows the interaction of the various strategies that create the effect we know as "voice."

How different is the effect when 17th century English philosopher Thomas Hobbes describes the passions of mankind:

Grief for the calamity of another is PITY, and arises from the imagination that the like calamity may befall himself, and therefore is called also COMPASSION, and in the phrase of this present time a FELLOW-FEELING.

The first passage, with its particularity, evokes pity and compassion. The second passage, with its abstractions, defines them. If you write like the first one, you'll sound like a great journalist. If you write like the second, you will sound like an antique philosopher.

The most powerful tool on your workbench to test your writing voice is oral reading. Read your story aloud to hear if it sounds like you. I know what you’re saying, “You can't be serious. You don't literally mean that I should read the story aloud. Perhaps you mean I should read the story "in-loud," quietly, with my lips moving.”

No, I mean out loud, and loud enough so that others can hear.

The writer can read the story aloud to herself or to an editor. The editor can read the story aloud to the writer, or to another editor. It can be read this way to receive its voice, or to modulate it. It should be read in celebration. So that you can hear the problems that must be solved.

Writers complain about tone-deaf editors who read with their eyes and not with their ears. The editor may "see" an unnecessary phrase, but what does the deletion of that phrase do to the rhythm of the sentence?

Until next time,
billwilcox


Editor's Picks


Adventurous Picks

 Invalid Item Open in new Window.
This item number is not valid.
#994951 by Not Available.

*Note1* “It’s a puppy,” shouted Nikki as she fell to her knees to pry open the bag. As she did, a second puppy tumbled out and was immediately scooped up by Karen.

 Invalid Item Open in new Window.
This item number is not valid.
#961188 by Not Available.

*Note1*I felt so bad for Bonnie. She's always had a tough exterior but a warm heart. It was hard for me to see her so upset. She couldn't bring herself to go into Shannon's room. I told her it was alright; she didn't have to go in.

Cerebronaut Open in new Window. (13+)
Technology is a double-edged sword. So are other things.
#923237 by Waltz Invictus Author IconMail Icon

*Note1*The child’s blank face was turned toward the window, rendered rosy in the dying light of the Sun. Leffner donned his own crown, wincing as the probes pierced his skin to enter the receptors surgically implanted in his brain.

 Invalid Item Open in new Window.
This item number is not valid.
#607589 by Not Available.

*Note1*Once trapped in quicksand, it becomes most imperative not to panic and flail about; doing so will only cause the trapped to sink faster. Instead, try to lie flat and float. Also, if at all possible, reach out for an overhanging branch or vine; with luck the trapped will be able to pull free, thusly, turning a would be tragedy into a positive jungle experience.

Time of the Dragon: Part One Open in new Window. (13+)
The first part of the sequel to "The Dragon Rises" - Mulligan and the Serial Killers
#741455 by Jack Goldman Author IconMail Icon

*Note1*"He said it’s the highest level he’s ever measured in a human body that petite at that level of decomp and he can’t figure out how she made it as far as she did. He said the baby died of heat exposure sometime later, probably the next day but he can't pin it down this early."

 Invalid Item Open in new Window.
This item number is not valid.
#579367 by Not Available.

*Note1*As the seconds ticked by, I opened my eyes. Inside the Eye, it was nothing like I'd envisioned. A fog-like mist surrounded us in warmth. There was no sound--no feel of wind or movement. I tried to speak, but my voice did not carry. I could hardly feel Tem's arms around me. I should have relaxed into the quiet, but my heart grew louder, as if the horror were yet to come.

In The Spirit Of Brotherhood Open in new Window. (18+)
There was this American in Iraq...
#848359 by W.D.Wilcox Author IconMail Icon

*Note1*As Nick approached, one of the policeman kept staring at him. He wore a black uniform and carried an AK-47 -- he leveled the barrel at Nick. With a big smile, Nick threw up his hands in jest. The guard did not return the smile, but instead, got the attention of another policeman. There was a loud discussion between them and then both men hurried over to Nick yelling something totally incomprehensible.

 
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Ask & Answer


Adventurous Feedback

shaara
Submitted Comment:
Excellently written, my friend. I enjoyed the city names of America. What a lark! You get better and better!
Smiles,
Shaara
That’s what I like about you, Shaara, you always find time to offer feedback on
my newsletters. Thank you.


Vivian Author Icon
Submitted Comment:
Interesting newsletter, Bill. I'll refer people to it when they insist that my short stories should be longer, that so much more detail could be added. Yes, more could be added but was not needed. Carry on, Mr. Wild Bill. ~~ Viv
That is the glorious thing about Writing.Com, Viv, everybody has a different opinion of how your story should appear. I believe that it is usually because they read something good and they just don’t want it to end.

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