 Spiritual: October 02, 2013 Issue [#5917] |
  Spiritual
This week: A Spoonful of Sugar Edited by: Shannon  
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Welcome to the Spiritual Newsletter. I am Shannon and I'm your editor this week. |
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I'm a glass-half-full kinda girl. Although I'm not always successful, I try to see the silver lining--the blessing--in every situation and oftentimes find myself pointing it out to others.
"Did you know Grandpa's getting remarried on October 12?" my daughter shrieked into the phone, indignant. "Today's September 14, and it didn't occur to anyone to clue me in before now?"
"Wait, slow down. What's going on?"
"A few weeks ago Grandpa asked me to make a diaper cake for Katie, so I just called him to ask where to send it and he said, 'You're coming to my wedding, right?' I thought it was a joke. I actually said, 'Is this a joke?', but he swears he's getting married on October 12. What the heck is going on?"
"I have no idea. This is the first I've heard of any wedding plans. Who is he marrying? We were just up there in June?"
My daughter went on to say the new woman, Nancy, "is going through Grandma's things as we speak, and Grandpa says she's already taken 12 boxes to the thrift store." Then she started crying. "Mom, I've been asking him to give me something of Grandma's ever since she died--something personal like something she made or a favorite pair of earrings or something. If I lived closer I'd just go through her stuff myself until I found something I liked that reminds me of her, but we're hundreds of miles away! Now I'll never get the chance."
I know Pat's been lonely. It's been six years since my mother-in-law passed away, but I can't imagine anyone else taking her place, living in her house, sleeping next to my father-in-law. They were married for 50 years, twice the amount of time I've been married to their son. The whole new mother-in-law thing is a hard concept to grasp, but I'll get there. I'm happy he's found someone to spend the rest of his life with. It's difficult to find love and companionship when you're young let alone when you're 76. I hope it works out the way they want it to, and I wish them the best.
Then on September 20 my father-in-law called. I was at work and don't typically pack my cell around with me, so I missed the call. He rarely calls me (usually only when he can't get ahold of my husband), so I wasn't too concerned, but then he called again. Worried something was wrong, I walked into the break room to answer.
"Shannon, how are things?"
"Good. I'm sorry I missed your first call. I'm at work and didn't know you'd called until just now. Is everything okay?"
"Yeah, I just wanted to know your mailing address. I have something I want to send you."
I gave him the address. He's never sent me anything in my life, I thought. It's not my birthday or our anniversary or Christmas. I wonder--
"You know, Nancy's been cleaning out Fern's stuff to make room for her own stuff."
"Yes," I said.
"Well, it's the darndest thing. We found two wrapped Christmas presents, one for you and Ruffus [my husband, Del. His family calls him by his middle name] and one for Kyle [my son]. I've never seen them before. I don't know if Fern intended to give them to you the Christmas before she died or if she was going to give them to you for Christmas the year she passed, but I'm curious to know what's in 'em. Yours doesn't make any noise, but Kyle's does, like it's a toy or something."
I was speechless. This sounds like something you'd read in a book or see in a movie, I thought. My eyes brimmed and my throat burned. I doubt it's a toy. Kyle was 16 when she died. "Well I ... I'm not sure I want to open them."
"Well, there is that."
"I mean, they're the last presents she'll ever wrap for us. Once they're opened...."
"If you do open them, can you let me know what's in them?"
"Yes, of course I will. I'll talk to Rufe and see what he wants to do."
On Friday September 27 I received the package containing the two presents and it rests, unopened, on my kitchen counter to this day--not necessarily because I don't want to open it, but because we decided we'll open it together, as a family, and Del is in Nevada for the next three weeks (the package arrived the day after he left).
"Are you sure you want to open it?" I asked Del. "It's the last present she ever wrapped for us."
"Of course I want to open it. I thought I'd opened the last present she would ever wrap for me six years ago. It's like a time capsule. Whatever it is, she wanted us to have it."
So the blow of my father-in-law's remarriage is softened by these two unexpected gifts from the past. It's as if Fern's saying, "It's okay, Shannon. I might be gone, but we will always be part of each other. You were in my thoughts when I bought this gift, and you're in my thoughts still."
How does that Julie Andrews song go--"A spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down"? It makes me smile just thinking about it.
The presents will remain unopened until my husband comes home. They've waited six years to be unwrapped, so I guess three more weeks won't make much difference.
I never got the chance to say goodbye to my mother-in-law; they wheeled her in to the surgery suite and she never regained consciousness. Somehow this feels like closure--closure wrapped in Christmas paper and addressed to me.
Goodbye, Fern, and thank you ... for everything.
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The following is in response to "Spiritual Newsletter (September 4, 2013)" :
shepherd46 says, "Wonderful article on death! So sad but very insightful and how quickly death can come at anytime--for anyone. This is a great reminder on what is really important!" Thank you! I'm glad you liked it. 
Quick-Quill  says, "This newsletter touched my heart. I remember when we first heard my father had cancer. After Chemo the doctor told us it didn't help. The cancer spread and he had 6-9 weeks left. We believe in divine healing, how could we not when we had seen the hand of God work in our family in little things that seemed big at the time, but not as big as this. What transpired over the next four weeks is a miracle. My father is alive today. No cancer and only a small scar inside shows where it was. We don't know why God allows one to live and not another. Maybe writing this today will give someone the faith they need to reach God and ask for help. I do know, no matter the outcome He is always there." I agree with you, and I am so happy to hear your dad's doing well. Sarah believes in God and has faith that everything happens for a reason. I was amazed by how well she's holding up, and I know she and Jordan are each other's courage and strength right now. Thank you for sharing. 
BIG BAD WOLF Feeling Thankful  says, "To paraphrase the late Brian Jacques, 'Life is not like the seasons, unending. However, one must take comfort in smelling the blossoms of the Late Rose.'" Well said. Thank you for reading and commenting. 
monty31802 says, "Your Newsletter reminded me of an older write of mine. It is a bit of an answer to your fine Newsletter." Thank you, Monty.  I've included your beautiful submission below.
The following is in response to "Spiritual Newsletter (August 7, 2013)" :
Chrisola  says, "I love the story 'Holy now' and how sweet and loving life would if we appreciate that every creature belongs to one family? It is a good piece of writing; eyes and mind opener." Aw, thank you! I appreciate your kindness.
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