 Spiritual: February 12, 2013 Issue [#5507] |
  Spiritual
This week: If At First You Don't Succeed Edited by: Shannon  
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Welcome to the Spiritual Newsletter. I am Shannon and I'm your editor this week. |
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"They'll tell you that failure is not an option. That is ridiculous! Failure is ALWAYS an option. Failure is the most readily available option at all times, but it's a choice. You can choose to fail or you can choose to succeed." ~ Chael Sonnen
I have friends and family alike who think they've wasted their lives. "I haven't accomplished anything," they say, yet they're gainfully employed, they're home owners, they've been happily married for decades, they've raised healthy, content, productive children, and they have friends and family who love them. I don't know about you, but that sounds like success to me.
When I hear people complain about how they've wasted their lives I like to ask them what their ideal success story would look like. Inevitably the subject of money comes up. Travel. Material goods like fancy cars, designer clothes, big houses, expensive jewelry. I ask if they think all those things would make them happy, and of course they say yes. Then I ask what happiness means to them. This one they have to think about a little.
"Oh, I don't know--being happy!" one person said. "Content." Then she paused and thought about it for a minute. "Knowing my husband loves me. Knowing he and my kids are healthy and safe. Watching my grandchildren open their presents on Christmas morning. Sipping cocoa in front of the fire and watching the snow fall outside. Snuggling up with a good book. Springtime. Birds chirping, bubble baths, and B.B. King. Good food. My husband and I growing old together."
"When you picture yourself with your husband thirty years from now, does it matter whether he's wearing Armani or WalMart?"
"No." She smiled.
"You already have the things that bring you happiness."
"Yeah, but being rich would give me the freedom to enjoy them more."
On April 6, 2006 my eldest daughter went into labor with my first grandchild. I was scheduled to work that day, but I told them I couldn't make it and why. At the time I worked for a staffing agency, and they'd send me to whatever hospital, clinic, prison, or nursing home needed some extra help, and it changed on a day-to-day basis. The scheduler, Jennifer, tried to make me feel guilty by saying everyone was counting on me to be there--that I'd made a commitment and it would make me and the agency look bad if I backed out. I said, "Jennifer, fifty years from now when I'm on my deathbed I doubt I'll say, 'Man, I really wish I'd worked that day back in April of '06!' but I know I'll say, 'I really wish I'd been there when my first grandchild was born.'"
I didn't work that day, or the next for that matter, and I've never regretted it. Not for an instant.
I think it all comes down to what's important to you. What is success? I bet the adult children of stay-at-home moms would be deeply hurt if their mothers said they'd "wasted their lives" and "didn't accomplish anything." What constitutes happiness? Have you sat down and really thought about it? Have you asked yourself, What makes me happy? You may be surprised by your answers.
Thank you for reading.
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Although I try to feature items by current and active WDC authors, occasionally I include items by people who haven't been on the site for a while. Some have moved on to the celestial plane (white portfolios) while others have just moved on. Some people have criticized me for including their writings as featured selections, but I don't correlate someone's frequency of site participation with the relevance or merit of their work.
I hope you enjoy this week's featured selections. Please do the authors the courtesy of reviewing the ones you read. Thank you, and have a great week!
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The following is in response to "Spiritual Newsletter (January 22, 2013)" :
Zeke  says, "Now she knows how you felt about her." Aw, thank you for that, Zeke! It brought tears to my eyes. I pray you're right. 
ANN Counselor, Lesbian & Happy  says, "Thank you for reminding us to tell others of our appreciation. My 52-year-old niece also died suddenly in her living room this week. Life is much too short so you've reminded us of something extremely important. I spent my career in Boise working with nonprofits. A great place to live. Keep writing; you know how to touch lives in a personal way." Thank you for your kindness, Ann. I am so sorry to hear about your niece. Peace and blessings to you and your family. 
Quick-Quill  says, "What a great followup NL to your last one. It just reemphasizes how much we need to connect rather than isolate ourselves. Good job!" Thank you, and thank you for taking the time to read and comment. 
shepherd46 says, "Wonderful article on friendship, love, and the importance of telling people how much you care about them and to do it soon. Learned much from this piece!" Thank you, Morningstar. 
The following is in response to "Spiritual Newsletter (January 15, 2013)" :
Tao writer  says, "Very touching story. Children can teach us so much more--to live in the moment and be grateful for every minute of our lives. I think in the hurried pace and stress of our lives we desperately want to recapture that childlike energy that sees hope, beauty, and love in everything. That is the promise of childhood: to live and enjoy the moment. As writers we should always find inspiration in such sacrifices and honor their passing into timeless stories." I couldn't agree with you more. We can learn so much from children, like acceptance and unconditional love and gratitude and generosity. Thank you for reading. 
Mia - craving colour says, "Hi Shannon. I enjoyed your reflection, and story of Elena. Our family has just lost a loved one. We are thankful for every expression of love we extended, and I treasure my last note from him signed 'Love Dad'." Oh, I am so sorry about your dad, Mia. Reading what you wrote about his last note brought tears to my eyes. Thank you for sharing it. 
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