 Comedy: June 15, 2011 Issue [#4448] |
  Comedy
This week: The Expense of Trying to Save Money Edited by: Sophurky  
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Hi, I'm Sophurky ~ your editor for this edition of the Comedy Newsletter. This week I'll share about a little eco-friendly project we did around our home in an attempt to save money and water. Which of course ended up costing us a fortune and not save any water, yet. Perhaps my tale will help inspire you to write about your own home improvement foibles (comedy genre, not tragedy, hopefully)!  |
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The Rain Barrel
We (and by we I mean my husband, Mr. Sophy) recently installed a rain barrel on one side of the front of our house so we can collect rain water to use for watering our gardens. We figured it might save us some money on our water bill, and be ecologically-friendly by using rainwater for our watering needs. However, we aren't sure when we'll exactly start saving money (or water) since the project already has cost more than we imagined it would, and of course, it hasn't rained much more than a drizzle since we installed it two weeks ago.
It all started out innocently enough. Some friends had signed up to make their own rain barrels at a local environmental action agency. They invited us to join them, and we were game because we're all about saving water and money. But then we found out it would take three hours and some actual labor to make them ourselves, so we opted to pay twice as much and just buy our own, ready-made rain barrel. Which meant, of course, that when we went to buy one rain barrel we came home with two of them because two is always better (and more expensive) than one, and this way we could have one in the front yard and one in the back.
Now the thing is you can't just come home and plunk your rain barrel on the ground. You have to do some prep work. You have to alter your current downspout from your roof gutters by cutting and then adding a special piece of PVC that will direct the water into the barrel. You also have to prepare the ground under the downspout where the barrel will go first by leveling it the dirt (and in our case, adding a layer of sand to make it PERFECTLY level, and then adding cinder blocks or a wooden frame to elevate the barrel a foot or more off the ground (also making sure they are level). You elevate the barrel so the water will flow out of the hose attached to the bottom of the barrel when we are ready to water with it (gravity will help it drain out of the hose, or something scientific like that).
But before all of that, Mr. Sophy was concerned that if we ever got more than 55 gallons of rain water from the gutters during a big storm, the barrel might overflow and then all of that excess water would go down into our foundation and have to be handled by the sump pump, possibly overwhelming it. So he installed a very clever bit of PVC that will divert the overflow (after we turn a switch) down into our sump pump line when the barrel is full. Of course that means we have to go outside during rainstorms to check and see if the barrel is full to turn the switch. But Mr. Sophy said he would do it so I didn't argue with him. (Basically I sat in a chair in the front yard with a lovely beverage and watched him do all the work, and offered many helpful comments along the way.)
But then he worried there might be TOO much water flowing into our current sump pump line that runs to the street, so he decided he should dig up a section of our front yard and replace1.5" PVC pipe that diverts our sump pump water out to the curb with larger 3" PVC, and so he did that. He carefully dug up chunks of dirt/grass, replaced the PVC, and then put the dirt/grass all back as if nothing happened. It was only after that unexpected part of the project that he leveled and elevated (and leveled again) and got the downspout in just the right spot. Obviously all of this required $everal trips to Menard$ for just the right $upplie$. Here is the beautiful end result:
** Image ID #1785188 Unavailable **
Then we sat around waiting for it to rain. We got so desperate to see if it would work, we almost sent him up to the roof with a hose (but then realized we'd be negating the whole "saving water" aspect of the project). Finally the skies turned grey and the skies opened up drizzled briefly. Here is the drop of water that finally went into the barrel after all that fuss.
** Image ID #1785191 Unavailable **
Needless to say Rain Barrel #2 is still sitting in our garage, unelevated and unattached to any downspouts or sump pumps. We can't install it until we save enough money up to buy everything we need to install it in the backyard (so that we can save water and the planet)!  |
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Now for several comments from my last Comedy Newsletter about the "rapture," "Comedy Newsletter (May 18, 2011)" :
From MumstheWord 
This was SUPERB! I had such a chuckle as I read it that I had to share it with my lesser half. What a great example of comedic writing. You just can't beat a bit of well-placed, well-timed sarcasm.
Super Newsletter!
Thanks so much for your kind words - glad you enjoyed it! 
From Fredmom
Nice newsletter! Its just like America Online to make people insanely mad on Armageddon...
AOL actually can make people insanely mad without Armageddon, lol. 'Tis why we call it AOHell!
From Prosperous Snow celebrating 
Hi Sophy,
Perhaps the Cubs winning the World Series would indicate the end of the world.
Snow
Yeah I'm pretty sure it would!
From Katya the Poet 
Hilarious! I will be left behind, too, and thanks for inviting me to the After the Rapture party!!
It wouldn't be an After the Rapture party with you.
From Mummsy 
I saw a brand spanking, shiny new Mercedes the other day with Judgement Day bumper stickers and thought "there's gotta be a story here." Personally, I hope he's parked in front of my house on May 21st.
So how's your new car?!?
From Diane
I look forward to the seeing how the rapture affects the world economy. Less people should result in higher supply and lower demand, which should result in the price of gas falling! And maybe those banks that hold the notes on my car and house will all be raptured so I don't have to pay them! Hey, I have look on the bright side of being left behind... right? Thanks for the laugh!
Well shoot, your "bright side" makes a lot of sense and now I wish the "rapture" had happened, doggonit!
From Yukimama
Hi Sophy,
I loved this. I too, think all this end of the world stuff is a little hard to fathom. Has anyone ever thought that the Mayan's just got tired of recording time? I can see a couple of Mayans sitting around the fire and one saying to the other, "Hey Itzel, my hand is getting tired. Let's just stop here." Isn't time infinite? When would be a good time to stop?
There was also that January 2000 scare when the computers were supposed to all stop working at once. And the world was going to be thrown back into the stone ages. I worked at a bank at that time and people were coming in and taking out thousands and thousands of dollars in cash from their accounts. If we were supposed to be thrown back into the stone ages, how would paper money help you? I would think you would have more bargaining power with food and water then paper, unless you needed some to wipe with.
HAHAHAHAHA! Thank YOU for the laughs. Tired Mayans and your last line made my day.
From LJPC - the tortoise
 Sophy, I had no idea about this new May 21/Oct 21 world-ending thing. Like the recession and unemployment aren't bad enough? Maybe that's the point--it puts little things like global warming into perspective.
I loved the headlines! The whole NL had me laughing. I look forward to your next one...if we're still here... 
-- Laura
Awww thanks so much, always happy to hear I tickled a funny bone!
From Joy 
Hahaha! I'm staying down here with you Sophy. I've seen enough of the other kind.
12/21/12: NASA bulletin: That *%^&!*asteroid is about to hit just the way Mayans told it to.
2012 Republican bulletin: end of the World, Obama chosen again.
12/21/12: My house. I'm baking a cake. I want to perish sweetly.
YAY! Cake party at Joy's!
From Eva
Thank you for this very informative newsletter. We here in Europe are totally unaware of this newest, very important date. But wait-I'm also confused...which one is it? Today, October, or 2012? I'm already a half a century old, and have survived multiple End-of-the-World dates, but you never know, maybe this time they're right? The good thing is that I will be left behind 
I can be of no help in alleviating your confusion, obviously, lol.
From Specter
Should I remain silent or should I write something revealing to a disbelieving world? The word "rapture" is not written anywhere in the Bible. Rapture is the gibberish of mankind. People run to some odd-ball man for answers--just look at the Jim Jones jinx, as well as others, like the Heaven's Gate flapper. This world is so messed up, they cannot distinguish the difference between up and down, little alone, right and wrong. Who has the answers? God does--read the Bible without the confusions. Be prepared to be blown away like chaff. The end of the world is one of the most misunderstood. The movie "2012" even got it wrong, for the most part. It's going to be worse! And that by FIRE.
slick
You know this is the Comedy Newsletter, right? 
That's all for this month -- see you next time! And on behalf of the other regular Comedy Newsletter Editors, Robert Waltz  and Ẃeβ࿚ẂỉԎḈĥ  remember to WRITE AND LAUGH ON! Sophurky |
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