Comedy: June 15, 2005 Issue [#426]

Comedy  This week:   Edited by: The Milkman                              More Newsletters By This Editor   1. About this Newsletter 2. A Word from our Sponsor 3. Letter from the Editor 4. Editor's Picks 5. A Word from Writing.Com 6. Ask & Answer 7. Removal instructions When writing your next comedy story, poem, essay or eulogy, keep in mind these quotes that I found in the "Toastmaster's Treasure Chest"... A man shows his character by what he laughs at --- German Proverb I think Comedy writing is also a good indicator of what kind of person you are. So please take into consideration who it is you are laughing at. Laughter: The sensation of feeling good all over, and showing it principally in one spot --- Josh Billings You know he is right and the one spot to have it shown is right here in the Writing.Com Comedy Newsletter. We like to hear people laugh, but not when we're chasing our hat down the street --- Author not listed So write about chasing your Stories.Com baseball hat down the street and hopefully your reviewer won't say they laughed at you. A pun is the lowest form of humor ~~~ when you don't think of it first --- Oscar Levant My advice to beating your friends to the punnies, especially on Scroll... learn to type. Lastly, and this tidbit will need no motherly advice from me... No young man ever expects to grow up and be as dumb as his father --- Author not listed. If you think you have what it takes to write humor, then you will want to check out this comedy inspired group held by my good friend elizm446. I might even divulge a couple of my writing tips...   Invalid Item  This item number is not valid. #923867 by Not Available. ~!~ ~!~ ~!~ ~!~ ~!~ ~!~ ~!~ ASIN: B07N36MHWD Dear Writer, You Need to Quit (QuitBooks for Writers Book 1) Product Type: Kindle Store Amazon's Price: $ 7.99 Buy Now! Tangents Have you ever noticed that an embarrassing moment for someone else is something for us to laugh at and when it happens to us we call for the God of relaxing baths, Calgon. Why, or maybe I should ask, how is a bath bead, bath soap or bubbles able to wash away so many worries and turn them into a black ring around our tub? Have you ever really thought about that? Most of you won’t spend the time with worry over this ring and I don’t blame you either because some bath bead engineer also created the scrubby bubbles to make those a worry free endeavor, but… where do those little brushing bubbles go when they are in the midst of one of their embarrassing moments? They just can’t go down the drain and forget that the whole thing happened, the other bubbles would make fun of them. So they spend all of their energy just trying to stay in your porcelain tub. You know this soapy lather as the suds that have to be rinsed down the drain several times with shots of fresh water and even a little by-hand persuasion. They are also the suds that, if not rinsed thoroughly, leave the soap scum or discolored haze at the bottom of the tub usually around the drain. They are thankful that your knees were hurting, you were low on elbow grease or that you were in so much of a hurry that you left them clinging on for dear life. I believe evaporation would be a slow, painful death but I believe it would be worth it knowing that I was going to be rinsed in to the sewer system of life days, weeks and possibly months after any of the other, meaner scrubby bubbles did. Wow, did I go off on a tangent there. I was going to tell you of one of my most embarrassing moments from my childhood. I guess now it is all just Mr. Bubble down the drain now. ??? Questions of the Week ??? What one embarrassing childhood memory are you willing to share with the readers of the Comedy Newsletter? ** Image ID #812578 Unavailable **                     Red is   Alexander Graham Bell was the Devil  (E) One man's view of the telephone and its uses #783294 by Rasputin Maybe not an biography of Mr. Bell but possibly one of the Rasputin family...lol Orange is   Invalid Item  This item number is not valid. #940371 by Not Available. I'd say that this inventor had an obsession for donuts. Yellow is Lorie, With a Comb, On the Starboard Bow  (13+) Sally's solved the mystery, but no one believes her. #970276 by HawaiianPeach This story may not be a self-help article but it does include a warning for American Campers in Germany. Green is   Invalid Item  This item number is not valid. #970958 by Not Available. May not be good advice but it does relate to "Invalid Item" . Blue is   Invalid Item  This item number is not valid. #969709 by Not Available. Married life... where was this article when I was married? Indigo is   Invalid Item  This item number is not valid. #886303 by Not Available. A not so silent prayer from a student. Violet is   Invalid Item  This item number is not valid. #607858 by Not Available. The phones and their companies all have their problems.   Submit an item for consideration in this newsletter! http://www.Writing.Com/main/newsletters.php?action=nli_form Have an opinion on what you've read here today? Then send the Editor feedback! Find an item that you think would be perfect for showcasing here? Submit it for consideration in the newsletter! http://www.Writing.Com/main/newsletters.php?action=nli_form Don't forget to support our sponsor! ASIN: B01MQP5740 Guerrilla Publishing: a sleaze-free guide to writing and book marketing Product Type: Kindle Store Amazon's Price: $ 4.99 Buy Now!   Have a question or comment for the Editor? http://www.Writing.Com/main/newsletters.php?action=nli_form ASIN: B004PICKDS Classic – Creative Writing Prompts and Story Games – Storyteller Cards – Teacher Tool Product Type: Toys & Games Amazon's Price: Price N/A Buy Now! To stop receiving this newsletter, go into your account and remove the check from the box beside the specific topic. Be sure to click "Complete Edit" or it will not save your changes.

This printed copy is for your personal use only. Reproduction of this work in any other form is not allowed and does violate its copyright.