 Spiritual: November 03, 2010 Issue [#4058] |
  Spiritual
This week: Fear of Failure Edited by: KimChi  
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Hello, I am the gorgeous, brilliant, talented, and utterly fabulous Kim "Success" Chi.
Today we'll talk about the fears that keep us from success. |
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"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine, as children do.
We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.
It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."
~Maryanne Williamson, author of "A Course in Miracles"
Have you ever felt completely fabulous? As if the entire universe were aligning with you, the earth's orbit tilting just enough to let the sun shine directly on your life and accomplishments? I recently had such A Very Good Day. My daughter won an award, and I was awarded just for rearing her. Now that is an honor and a humbling experience.
Like many people, I blushed and said "thank you", afraid to speak what was in my heart for fear the words would come out gibberish. When church members approached to offer congratulations, I waved their compliments away with excuses. "But I just got lucky with a good kid." "But her school system is amazing." "But she's always been special." But, but, but.
For who am I to be a fabulous mother?
Have you ever known you were a good writer? Have you jumped from the chair after writing The Perfect Story or Poem and wanted the entire world to see your fine turn of phrase, your alliterative genius, your flowing prose?
Perhaps then fear of success reared its Medusa head. "But it was only a blog entry." "But it needs to be edited." "But I'm no Shakespeare."
For who are you to be so talented, so utterly brilliant?
Who are you NOT to be? Do you fear your last work will be your best, that you'll have no more good ideas? Unlikely. As with any hobby or career, we get better with experience. Rejection? The best writers have the most rejection slips.
Do you fear others will think you proud? Pride in yourself and your work is not a sin, but an absolute necessity for success. If you don't believe in yourself, will an agent, a publisher, an editor? No way! If you've got it, strut right up to the stage and broadcast it.
If someone thinks your work is amazing, don't dissuade them of that notion! A simple "thank you" is always courteous, but there's nothing wrong with adding, "I worked hard on that project, and I'm proud of it."
Once the words are out, there's no going back. People will clamor to read your work, or ask for advice from a person who is so obviously sure of their style, their abilities, their self. If you don't know what you're talking about, you better start doing some research. For now you are the role model-whether that role is writer, salsa dancer, business mogul, or mother.
"And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."
Will you come out of the fear of darkness, fear of imperfection, fear of failure, fear of success?
I will. Many people think of me as the brunette mom at the bus stop. Really? JUST a mom? I am Kimchi--a creative writer, a nurturing mother. I capture snippets of family history in scrapbook pages and poems. I chronicle my pain and triumph in short stories. I learn about myself in my blog and share myself in my newsletters.
And if I may say so, I'm one sexy witch for 44. 
One day, you'll see my name in print, because really, what is there to fear?
Your turn.
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Please review or rate when you read. Authors love feedback!
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there is really no such thing as failure.
It's an easy lesson to learn.
Ingredients are your words, like chocolate
and coconut cream. You mix in a few
dates and hazel nuts, chopped fine.
The young woman stood on the stage,
knees trembling as leaves in a storm.
Formless faces and judgmental judges
waited to watch her attempt to sing
become a failure on which to pounce.
A child, I always had a place
to hide, to mark as my own space.
It was my bedroom. It was mine
and no one else's.
No closed doors without the question 'why?'
but it was seldom needed. No one bothered to come by.
I was there alone to write and read.
| |  | Failure (E)
What chronic illness can feel like
#1248820 by PCP |
In the beginning there was ambition, planning and forward movement.
Goals attainable, nothing impossible.
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I'm not as good a writer as I thought I was, I might as well quit right now.
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Spanish moss hangs from the boughs of live oaks, quiet poets lost in a sweet nostalgia that transcends all but a semblance of thought. A momentary gust stirs their sacred pen to paper, and they whisper soft and archaic musings, swaying with the eternal timelessness of their peaceful being.
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Too late to pray when you drown yourself in sin
Fast fading the evening in the mountains
Grey the sky to drift within the crags
Seeing storms in a world of doom
Flooding the river below
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I appreciate all the lovely responses to last month's newsletter. This month's question: Do you fear failure or success? Do these fears help or hurt your chances of fulfilling your dreams?
twon721
In a newsletter recently the topic was about silence and its importance and the strong link with God's ways. In this letter Buddha suggests that we, if we can, be void from all help to obtain freedom. I agree with both newsletters. My silly question is if God is a living man should we now fear the loner ? does he, the loner hold more knowledge than he say ?
Thank you,
Tony.
Excellent question, Tony, but I'm afraid I can't answer it. I would guess the loner does hold much knowledge, and my personal preference is not to fear another human unless they're trying to harm me at that moment. What do you Spiritual NL readers think?
hbar
Does it matter if fear is rational or irrational? I think how we deal and cope with our fears is more important than how reality based they are. If we deal with our fear we come to learn that many may be irrational, then it becomes easier to banish that fear. Just a thought.
And who is to say there isn't a monster lurking in that dark corner, waiting for an opportunity to take us, or curse us with an irrational fear?
Just one more odd thought out of my confused head.
Hmmm.... *thinking* Your confused head is probably due to my lack of clarity. Perhaps the question should not be whether the fear is logical, but useful--because you're right-dealing with it is the only way to banish it. I'm thinking more of the ones we suspect aren't real.
Kåre เลียม Enga 
I believe writing helps with anxiety and depression. Much of my poetry and prose addresses one or the other. My blog was started when I was homeless in Kansas and that experience of always "having the switch on" was devastating and contributed to my disability. For those who sleep in their own bed every night: you really don't want that experience.
Absolutely, Enga. So many great writers were one, the other, or both. My motto? "Kiss me or curse me. I can't write when I'm stuck in neutral."
I first met you when you were homeless, and I was amazed at how full your life remained; you kept your head up and charged on. I know you've opened my eyes and changed my view of the homeless forever. The closest most of us will come to your experience is camping, except we have a warm home to return to.
embe
My responce to cope with fear.
Read -
"Fear No Evil"
The faith of Noah, no need to fear the devil.
by embe (133)
I've linked it above. Blessings!
Cynaemon 
Hi, WitChiWoman, Thanks for writing about fear. I think the worst thing an author can do is to tell you at the beginning of a book that you fear something. I immediately put the book down. I don't have a lot of fears, and I don't need someone else telling me that I do.
I don't have a lot of fears, either, but I do enjoy the macabre and getting goosebumps from something dark and primeval.
saraiv
Wooo! I'm excited for these! I always fear writing about spirituality...not exactly on WdC...but in real life situations with classes. I did it once, and it didn't end well. I've kind of become discouraged. But I realized this like two weeks ago, so my NaNoWriMo Novel is going to be based on a Young Adult Struggle with Christ.
Thanks for the awesome read!
Roxiie Navia Slequer
I have the same problem-what will people think? A YA struggle with Christ is what you're meant to write, then. Good luck with NaNo!
Zeke
Some say that the most primal fear we all share is being eaten alive. This fear is even greater than being killed. I guess some hard wiring is involved in all of us.
Zeke
Thanks for the Hanibal Lecter visual. 
Steve adding writing to ntbk.
Thank you for sharing this newsletter today. I found one particular one that made me cry because of the nature of the story and the way it ended with a good ending, in a sense.
The insertion of these newsletters into our emails on a weekly basis provides fodder for much good reading and this one is no exception. Bless you for your participation as an editor in this ministry.
Copenator out!
Thanks for the feedback! Blessings to you as well.
A.T.B: It'sWhatWeDo
I deal often with fear...not as much as I used to, but for many of the same reasons as before - one of which in particular may prove to be a significant obstacle in hearing what I hope to say here, and what I hope "Evergreen" means for anyone faced with that inability to move forward, regardless of why. For so many, fear is an issue of difference. Or unfamiliarity. Why fear what is so small in comparison to what could be? Understand how blessed we truly are even at our most fearful, and there you will find your story of now. Take care.
I agree-a lot of our fear stems from unfamiliarity-from walking down the halls of a new school to meeting people of other religions. Do it once or twice, and the fear recedes. That's my theory, and I'm stickin' with it.
Light
The human mind is an old machine. It is meant to protect us from all types of dangers. It is very good at finding all that has gone wrong in like situations in the past, be it our own past of the past of the human race.
One trick is to think like MR. Sock when faced with something that makes us uncomfortable or fearful. Ask yourself, what is actually here, right now; what am I actually experiencing? Your mind is playing tricks on you. Chances are, ther is nothing to fear.
Excellent observation. What if you know your mind is a trickster but can't stop it?
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