 Horror/Scary: September 23, 2009 Issue [#3282] |
  Horror/Scary
This week: Edited by: W.D.Wilcox  
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The High-Wire Act
Recently I was asked how to write a good opening for a horror story. Of course, I have to say a good opening is essential to any story, not just horror.
As you know, I’m a big believer in hooking the curious reader right out of the crypt. My opinion is, if you don’t catch them in that very first sentence (or paragraph) they will put your book back on the shelf and look for something more entertaining.
Because that’s really what we are, isn’t it: entertainers—artistic performers that use the Wonderful World of Words as magical props to amuse the masses. Like a juggler, or a high-wire act—or a juggler doing an act on a high-wire  —we have to ‘ooo’ and ‘ahhh’ the crowd at the very beginning least we run the risk of  boring them to death. And with the competition of television and movies, our performance has to be more death-defying than anything they can just simply watch—it has to grab them and not let go until the very end of the tale. We have to make our reader’s believe that if they put the book down, or don’t read the very next page, they might miss something spectacular.
So, how do we do it?
I like to call it ‘immersion’.
I believe that if you immerse the reader into the story—make them smell it, hear it, feel it, and see it—they will think they are part of it. Hell, if you're real good, you can even make 'em taste it.
My newest story, "Adriana's Tale" , opens this way: It was a perfect day, and the horror of it chilled Adriana’s heart.
The reader is left thinking, ‘how can a perfect day bring horror?’ It makes you want to read the line again. The words don’t mesh—they don’t go together—so the sentence leads them on to the next part.
Let’s take another example,
A man steps out of a hotel into the pouring rain and hears someone screaming.
In your ‘mind’s-eye’ you can kind of see the action happening, but that’s about all. What if you wrote it like this…
The man stepped out into the wet night, where the sound of marching armies was only the rain beating on the canvas awning. There was a terrible scream—blood-freezing. Someone shrieked as though they were being wrenched limb from limb, slit open, torn apart.
Now I don't know about you, but an opening like this would definitely catch my attention. 
Until next time,
billwilcox
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Bring In The Clowns
Excerpt: Confetti rained through the air, and as the boy looked up from the floor, he got the uneasy feeling that somehow the clown was inside his head, looking out through his eyes. His face paled then, as though something had been shaken loose inside of him. The clown’s unyielding gaze fed on that fear as he held out his hand to help the boy up. The child cringed at the thought of his touch and scurried behind the sofa nearly in tears.
“Don’t be afraid,” Joey smiled wickedly, his eyes rolling like ping-pong balls inside his head, “it’s just a little magic trick.”
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Excerpt: Insanity, the mother of its numerous dead children; the helium that inflates the balloons of the decaying clowns; it is the circus act that never went past the doors of its own mad house. Monsters is what they’re called- the undead performers of questionable acts- heads being removed, the bloody sawing of a body in half, the fall of an acrobat- with no safety line- to its death. It is a story of tears. It is a story of horror.
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Excerpt: Stuffed clown, Propped on that painted chair, Your silver painted eyes Glinting in the moonlight, Your floppy striped arms Arranged artfully so. Stare at me like you mean it.
Excerpt: A rosy line appeared below the red nose. The eyebrow grimaced and the rosy line grew bolder and fuller. It took on shape, like lips that had been tightly compressed, relaxing in slow motion.
The eye was looking at them. The size of the pupil kept changing slightly, and it blinked occasionally.
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Excerpt: Adelaide wanted to look away, but her eyes seemed locked in place. She watched as her sister's skin crackled and crisped, and the fat dripped off her body. Her eyeballs exploded, running melted pink jelly down her roasting cheeks. Hair fell off in clumps, and burned, releasing horrible odors. The smells of burnt flesh and hair overwhelmed Adelaide's senses and her head spun dizzyingly. When the body was charred black, two of the freaks removed it from the fire and laid it on a crude wooden table.
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Circus Act
nomlet 
Submitted Comment:
Excellent example. Good writing and insightful commentary. Your construction of Raheesha brings to mind the task of the master candlemaker. Don't neglect the craftmanship just because you're creation is destined to be snuffed out in the end.
SantaBee 
Submitted Comment:
What a gruesome autopsy, Bill. Thanks for sharing. Great tips!
AliceNgoreland 
Submitted Comment:
Great idea for the newsletter, and you did it very well.
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