 Comedy: February 13, 2008 Issue [#2221] |
  Comedy
This week: Edited by: Waltz Invictus  
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"I had thought — I had been told — that a 'funny' thing is a thing of a goodness. It isn't. Not ever is it funny to the person it happens to. Like that sheriff without his pants. The goodness is in the laughing itself. I grok it is a bravery... and a sharing... against pain and sorrow and defeat."
- Valentine Michael Smith
(Robert Heinlein,
Stranger in a Strange Land) |
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SINGLES AWARENESS DAY
Ah, February - the month of luuuuvv. Valentine's Day: flowers, candies, chocolates, and candlelight dinners. That's right, show your sweetie how much you love her by triggering her allergies and making her fat. Do try not to burn down the house.
But what about those who prove that Cupid's a lousy shot? The people who, for whatever reason (maybe you need to switch deodorants?) will sit by the phone in the dark this February 14, listening to the ticking of the clock and those unidentifiable sounds from the couple next door? Shall we pity them? Feel sorry for them? Nah, since this is the Comedy newsletter, we'll make fun of them!
Hey, easy with the tomatoes there - I was just kidding!
Never is aloneness so felt as on Valentine's day - hence its alternate name, "Singles Awareness Day." Alone on Thanksgiving? No problem - you didn't want to eat that much, anyway. Alone on Christmas? Well, at least you have your memories of happy family times in the past. Alone on the Fourth of July? Who cares? But being alone on Valentine's Day just makes you think you're pathetic.
Ah, but you're not. Just think of what you're missing:
 Spending all that money on someone else.
Those extra visits to the clinic.
Someone else pretending to like your dog, cat, rabbit or platypus.
Always having to run your life decisions past someone else.
Picking up after someone else.
Listening to someone else whine about having to pick up after you.
Doing extra sets of dishes.
Not having to make a decision about who to take on your next vacation.
Making wedding plans.
Going to divorce court.
The list goes on. No, single folks out there, there's certainly nothing pathetic about your situation. Quite the contrary! The freedom you have now should be cherished! Raise a glass in toast to yourselves, and hold your chin up high! After all, confidence is the #1 thing people look for in a potential mate.
(Man, I hope my wife doesn't subscribe to this newsletter.) |
Some humorous takes on romance, especially for Valentine's Day:
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Last month, I did a newsletter on hosting a comedy contest.
billwilcox sez: Great stuff Robert. I love comedy contests!
Yes, there should be more of them!
Satuawany  sez: Hey, nice informative newsletter. I wouldn't say you need a message forum, though. There are some great contests run through Survey Forms. I can think of some other item types (like Campfires!) that might do well for other types of contests, if the contest runner gets creative. 
For "free memberships" I've seen more great contests that ran from In & Outs and even static items. For the latter, with contestants emailing their entries to the contest runner. (And sometimes the entries get listed in the item as they're received.)
There's lots of ways for members to run contests, so long as they have the means for awarding and the motivation. 
Good points, all of them - creativity is always welcomed! I have an ongoing In&Out contest, myself. Covering all of the possibilities would have been time-consuming in one newsletter, though - if you're interested in more of the possibilities and options for running a contest, be sure to subscribe to the Contests & Activities Newsletter!
April Sunday  sez: Waltz provides the contest in a to-go bag. Read this step by step and your contest is sure to please. Now about those incentives and PRIZES!!! Maybe we give 'em plenty of both and entries come our way(?) Unsure. Perhaps combo's of all of the above. NICE NL!
Thanks! Of course, some people enter contests just for the exposure and learning experience, but hey - prizes are great incentives 
Lauriemariepea sez: hi, robert! how cool, that you featured Acme 's contests in your newsletter (and, by association, my story ). yay!!
i've wondered occasionally about running my own contest, but have always felt a bit intimidated--your newsletter this week makes the idea seem...simple. i can do simple. 
hopefully, if i create a contest, you'll be one to enter. (wink wink, nudge nudge)
thanks for the giggles, the mention, and the ideas.
Some contests are easier to run than others, as I'm discovering...
isiacs_mom sez: Waltz,
I enjoyed this Newsletter. Thanks for all the tips on entering a comedy contest. I love comedy! Who knows when inspiration will strike and cause one to be funny (I am still waiting).
It's not about the inspiration - it's about the perspiration. Once you have a deadline, you'll sweat it out!
Thanks to everyone who wrote in - keep the comments coming and
LAUGH ON! |
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