Short Stories: August 22, 2007 Issue [#1897]
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Short Stories


 This week:
  Edited by: Vivian Author IconMail Icon
                             More Newsletters By This Editor  Open in new Window.

Table of Contents

1. About this Newsletter
2. A Word from our Sponsor
3. Letter from the Editor
4. Editor's Picks
5. A Word from Writing.Com
6. Ask & Answer
7. Removal instructions

About This Newsletter

         Often I've heard, "I don't know how to start." Often I've written the following when I've reviewed, "Your story needs to 'grab' the reader from the first few sentences. You need a hook, a beginning that starts your story with a 'bang'."

         However, some people do not understand the "literary" terms grab, hook, start with a bang. Hopefully I'll be able to help in this issue.

Viv


Next week's editor will be Ms Kimmie Author Icon


Word from our sponsor

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Letter from the editor

Start with a Bang


         According to Les Edgerton, many good and even brilliant stories never get read past the first paragraph, or perhaps first page, because of a poor beginning.

         If the first part of a story does not "grab" the reader and cause him to want to read more, the author has failed no matter how wonderful the rest of the story may be. Begin with a vivid scene.

         The opening of a story should successfully set the stage for the reader, "hook" the reader, create with words the desire in the reader to want to read more.

         At the start, the problem should be introduced. That means that the problem is an event that changes the protagonist's world in some way, and the problem may not always mean trouble. The reader may not realize that what happens at the beginning is even a problem, only that it triggers a desire to know more.

         For example, if Johnny is a character in a children's story (yes, writing for children follows the same guidelines and contains the same needs as any good work) and has never walked to school by himself before, only with an adult by himself, he starts his first walk with excitement and trepidation. If the author writes:
Johnny had never walked to school by himself before. His mother or grandmother had always walked with him, where is the "bang." This example "tells" the situation, but it does not "show" the story.

          So, let's try showing and creating a "hook."
Johnny opened the door a crack. As he peeked out, he thought, Everything looks the same. He swallowed and opened the door farther. He stuck his head completely outside and searched the walk leading from the porch.

"Johnny," his mother said from behind him, "do you need me to walk to school with you again today?"

Johnny glanced over his shoulder. "Momma, I'm big enough to walk by myself now." He picked up his back pack and marched out the door. "I'm five years old now."


         Dialogue in the first few paragraphs helps catch a reader's attention and helps the reader to "see" what is happening. Melissa Stewart says, "Put dialogue to work." A good way to engage the reader immediately is to have captivating dialogue.

Indent}Excessive narration, expository, text causes the flow of the story to stop anywhere, but when needless narration begins the story, the reader loses interest immediately.

         Grab his attention by using a vivid scene; "show" the reader what is happening; hook his interest immediately; and start your story with a bang.

         The following link goes to a story I wrote (and which was published). I'm using this as an example for this newsletter because I wrote and rewrote and reworked the beginning many times.

 Another Storm Open in new Window. [13+]
Storms and nightmares foretell horror.
by Vivian Author Icon


***
Sources used in this newsletter include notes I've made over the years as well as
Harvey Stanbrough, "Stop interrupting," November 2006 The Writer; Les Edgerton, "HOOK, GRAB and PULL," August 2007 "i}Writer's Digest; and Melissa Stewart, "Write for children -- 12 steps to success," June 2006 The Writer.


Editor's Picks

Writings from W.Com


The Hannaria Series: Out of the Gray Open in new Window. [ASR]
How far would you go to save an enemy from assassination?
by Patricia Gilliam Author Icon

Image Protector
The Eye Open in new Window. [18+]
We all have a little devil inside just dying to get out.
by W.D.Wilcox Author Icon

 Bacon Open in new Window. [E]
Someone must stand up to the evil magical powers of Bacon. Bob is the only one who can.
by sean Author Icon

 Invalid Item Open in new Window. []

by A Guest Visitor

 Invalid Item Open in new Window. []

by A Guest Visitor

The Lost Balloon Open in new Window. [E]
A short narrative piece about a young boy who has tragically lost his red balloon.
by RoughitforGreen247 Author Icon

S'more good, clean, harmless fun. Open in new Window. [18+]
raising children
by SonofDrogo Author Icon


A short story contest:
Image Protector
Twisted Tales Contest Open in new Window. [13+]
A monthly contest for stories with a twist. Get 500 GPs for entering! Nov round open!
by Arakun the twisted raccoon Author Icon


 
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Ask & Answer

Words from Our Readers


         Last month I wrote about some common mistakes made when writing short stories. I appreciate the thoughtful thanks I received.

likenion
         So true, so simple to follow and still a lot of short stories suffer from these mistakes. I hope that a lot of writers are reading this so that they may improve. Wonderful newsletter!

puravida Author IconMail Icon
Vivian, Thank-you for the excellent newsletter. Those errors really made me take a second look at the way I handle short stories. It was very helpful.
Puravida

systemwolf8
Great newsletter! This will really help in my future projects. Thanks!

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andromeda Author IconMail Icon
suggestions. I can correct spelling errors and grammar, but I can't make improvement suggestions!

         Reading helps one make suggestions for improvement. Studying what others say about a work also helps. Giving suggestions involves letting the author know what worked for you as a reader and what didn't.

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StephBee Author IconMail Icon
Vivian, I loved your newsletter. For me, my pet peeve is researching. That's very important. You've got to be able to be accurate. I will lose interest immediately if I discover something that isn't accurate.

         I understand very well. One author, who used to be one of my favorites, put a town in Oklahoma in a location that was physically impossible. She had the town an day's wagon trip from one town and less than an hour from another. The first town is actually a six to eight hour trip by car from the second. Impossible.

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faithjourney

Hey Viv, thanks for the tips on common mistakes in short stories. I just switched to writing fiction after 5 years of writing non-fiction, and have struggled with the "short" part of writing stories! I've written 2 novellas, and really appreciate these tips on keeping it short!


Lornda Author IconMail Icon

Hi Vivian.
         Great newsletter! I enjoyed it very much. Right now, short stories is what I write, so this information was of great value to me.
         I was wondering...when is a short story no longer a short story?
         Thanks. Keep up the great work!
Lornda

         According to Dictionary of LaborLawTalk, the short story can be up to 20,000 words. The article also broke the figures down by three countries: in the U.S. up to 10,000 words; in the U.K. up to 5,000; and in Australia up to 3,500. All sources agree that a short story should be at least 1,000 words. Hope that helps.

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DRSmith Author IconMail Icon

For what it's worth, for me, I think a couple other items need mentioning. One being that some writers tend to want to "over kill" on description, using numerous words to convey a visual that tends to through off a reader's pace. Often times one word or a couple in combo can be most effective if thought and careful selection is deployed that will work much harder for the story. Another item is the tendency to narrate, when a "show not tell" technique can keep a reader riveted to a story, forming his own visual, and be carried along with your characters, theme, scenes, etc with excellent pace. For those interested, I have found a few in here, that in my opinion, are exemplary studies in such perfected technique... works by LeonardJK, Jerry Powell, Silverfeathers, Tosca.. merely to share a few. It would be worth while to have a look.

         I understand what you mean about "over kill," and I've covered that subject several times, even in this newsletter. However, I get reviews stating that I don't give enough detail, when I've given enough. After all, the reader should bring a bit of imagination to the table, too.

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So long until next time. I hope you read and write more stories.

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