 Comedy: March 06, 2024 Issue [#12443] |
This week: Wearing Of The Green Edited by: GeminiGem🐾  
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Hi ya! I'm GeminiGem🐾 and I'm one of the regular editors of the Comedy Newsletter. Let's talk about the Wearing Of The Green. |
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Wearing Of The Green
 I will not wear green on St. Patrick's Day. I just won't. Most of the time, I won't even remember that I'm "supposed" to wear green. Even if it occurs to me, I still won't be digging around in my closet looking for something emerald, lime, chartreuse, mint, forest, olive, seafoam, or sage. Not saying these colors don't exist in my wardrobe, because some of them do. I'm just saying I won't be wearing any of them on St. Patrick's Day.
Why? Is it because I like being pinched? Most decidedly not.
I don't know where my original aversion to this tradition came from for sure, but I suspect it started in childhood when I forgot to wear something green and I was fending off micro-assaults for an entire day. As a kid, I was always the smallest in my class. If we were lined up by size, I was at the front of the line or the tail-end of the line, with no exceptions. My small size made it easy for all of the other kids to pick on me when I didn't comply with this very American tradition of observing St. Patrick's Day.
Have you ever stopped to wonder what all the pinching is about, anyway? The lore is that leprechauns are mischievous folk who love to go about pinching people, especially on St. Patrick's Day. They cannot, however, see someone if they are dressed in green so they will pass by a green-clad person. To remind you that you could get pinched if you are not wearing green, you get...pinched. If that isn't American, I don't know what is.
Somewhere along the way, it became a thing, me not wearing green on purpose. I would be ready for the impending pinching, with threats like, "I'd like to see you try," and "I wouldn't if I were you." To my astonishment, my intimidation worked. I may be small, but my menace is mighty. I will not wear green on March 17th, and I dare you to try to make me.
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From my last Comedy Newsletter "The Sky Is Not The Limit"
Dave Ryan
I've yet to write anything over 2k words for a contest. Perversely enough, I do better with tight word counts that I do with more generous ones - it gives things less room to start falling apart.  One of these days I'll go past 2k words and probably get a nosebleed or a fit of the vapours and have to lie down in a darkened room for a couple of hours or so to get over the shock.
You may be peeking through the blinds to see if the word count police were coming for you...
Beholden
I love word limits, even when I have to rush endings a little to squeeze inside the limit. The contest I mourn the most is the 100-word flash fiction one by Lilli 🧿 ☕ . What greater fun is there than filling a limited container with more meaning than was thought possible? Quarts in pint pots indeed!
The failing that makes most wannabe writers excruciatingly boring to read is the inability to distinguish between what words and facts matter and what doesn't. And there's no better training in reducing to the essential than WDC limited word count contests.
I will pass along your thoughts about the 100-word flash fiction contest to Lilli. You make some really good points in your second paragraph. |
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