Comedy: July 05, 2006 Issue [#1139]
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Comedy


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  Edited by: Beyond the Cloud9 Author IconMail Icon
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Table of Contents

1. About this Newsletter
2. A Word from our Sponsor
3. Letter from the Editor
4. Editor's Picks
5. A Word from Writing.Com
6. Ask & Answer
7. Removal instructions

About This Newsletter

Comedy a.k.a. funny stuff.

Whatever your writing style or reading preference, comedy finds its way into everyone’s life in some form. Take time to look around and see the humor in life. Learn to love and laugh at yourself, and laugh with others.

This newsletter is designed to give you tips and entertainment, but mostly to put a smile on your face!


Word from our sponsor

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Amazon's Price: $ 4.99


Letter from the editor

*Pthb* *Bigsmile* *Pthb* *Bigsmile* *Pthb* *Bigsmile* *Pthb* *Bigsmile* *Pthb* *Bigsmile* *Pthb* *Bigsmile* *Pthb* *Bigsmile* *Pthb* *Bigsmile* *Pthb* *Bigsmile* *Pthb* *Bigsmile*



Restaraunt Etiquette for Toddlers by Zoe Elise

While dining out, it is important to keep the adults entertained. Waving hello to waiters and waitresses, blowing kisses, smiling and laughing are all perfectly acceptable. In the event of boredom, it is perfectly acceptable to scream loudly and watch the adults' faces contort.

While waiting for the food, is it okay to snack on the crayons provided. If they do not taste good, throw them on the floor and watch to see if anyone stumbles on them.

Sippy cups are a waste of time when dining out. Insist on drinking the adults drink, from their glass, of course.

If you are handed your sippy cup, throw it down in disgust.

If you drink two glasses of milk before your meal arrives and your belly gets full, it is okay, because then you can take your meal home with you.

While eating your meal, mutilate it with your fingers and hands as much as possible. Go ahead and poke holes in your grilled cheese sandwich or flip the macaroni and cheese off the spoon. No one will mind this because they live to please you.

Upon completion of your meal, pick up the plate and dump the remainder of food onto the table. Then attempt to throw the plate on the floor. This signifies that you are indeed finished eating.

After the adults clean up, insist on having more food.

Do try at least one bite of everyone else's food at the table. If it isn't good, it is okay to take it out of your mouth and give it back.

Upon leaving the restaraunt, smile and wave goodbye to everyone and watch them goo over how cute you are.

If you will follow these simple rules, dining out will be a fun experience.

Thank you for letting me write for you today,
Zoe Elise
(daughter of Beyond the Cloud9 Author IconMail Icon)


Editor's Picks

*Reading* *Laugh* *Reading* *Laugh* *Reading* *Laugh* *Reading* *Laugh* *Reading* *Laugh* *Reading* *Laugh* *Reading* *Laugh* *Reading* *Laugh* *Reading* *Laugh* *Reading* *Laugh* *Reading* *Laugh* *Reading* *Laugh*


Complete Seduction Open in new Window. (13+)
Free verse poem of seduction.
#1123389 by Diane Author IconMail Icon


 Invalid Item Open in new Window.
This item number is not valid.
#1091810 by Not Available.


Three Word Mayhem! Open in new Window. (13+)
Mayhem is afoot!
#555590 by Jay's debut novel is out now! Author IconMail Icon


 Brazilian Cultural Experience Open in new Window. (E)
A humorous description of learning about Brazilian culture in the USA.
#1087082 by C.J. Brown Author IconMail Icon


 I’ve Figured Out Sara’s Secrets! Open in new Window. (18+)
And Other Food Network Mysteries Debunked
#1080340 by Sam N. Yago Author IconMail Icon


 Invalid Item Open in new Window.
This item number is not valid.
#1077708 by Not Available.

 
Submit an item for consideration in this newsletter!
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Word from Writing.Com

Have an opinion on what you've read here today? Then send the Editor feedback! Find an item that you think would be perfect for showcasing here? Submit it for consideration in the newsletter!
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Don't forget to support our sponsor!

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Ask & Answer

*Question**Idea* Questions & Comments *Idea**Question*


billwilcox writes:

I just love your sense of humor. We had four kids one right after the other. It seemed liked my dear wife would get pregnant if we accidently bumbed into each other in the hallway. *sigh* I didn't sleep for seven years...*Worry*


Melissa is fashionably late! Author IconMail Icon writes:

*Laugh* I misplace things and find them in my hand all of the time. It must be a Mommy thing!


Vivian Author IconMail Icon writes:

Ahhh, Sherri Q, how well I understand trying to find something you're holding all the time. As the poem you highlighted says, I often have to search to find my lost memory. Ish. ~~ Viv


Nighala a.k.a. Doxie Do-Right Author IconMail Icon writes:

Sherri Q,

Great newsletter!!! If you ever need to find any of the pounds you lost, let me know, I think I've got them.

Nighala

I don't think I'll be wanting those back, but thanks anyway!


Breezy-E ~ In College Author IconMail Icon writes:

Sounds like my mom. She goes looking for her glasses, only to discover they were on the top of her head the whole time.
Breezy-E

Well at least I'm not alone out there. *Pthb*



Do you have a question or comment for the editor? You may fill out the feedback link below or email me or any of my fellow newsletter editors. We'd love to hear from you!

Melissa is fashionably late! Author IconMail Icon
Mavis Moog Author IconMail Icon
Holly Jahangiri Author IconMail Icon

Thanks for reading the Comedy Newsletter. See ya next time!
~Beyond the Cloud9 Author IconMail Icon


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Word from our sponsor
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