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Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4742524
Review #4742524
Viewing a review of:
 The Scheme Open in new Window. [ASR]
Daily Flash entry
by Elizabeth Author Icon
Review of The Scheme  Open in new Window.
Review by JayNaNoOhNo Author IconMail Icon
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
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This is a "Game of ThronesOpen in new Window. review!



Hello, Elizabeth!

*Checkb*Overall Impression:
This is a charming narrative that bounces between the comedic and the heartwarming with ease. It's a pleasure to read.

*Checkb*Title and Description:
I think the title is perfect, but the description is a bit lacklustre. It could be revamped to provide the reader with more of a teaser for the story.

*Checkb*Hook and plot:
I was hooked both when she wanted Ted to go away and again when Ted had his brilliant idea.

*Checkb*Characters and dialogue:
What makes this story so delightful is Ted's seemingly boundless creativity and the sometimes thin line between encouraging their dreams and teaching them the principles of right and wrong. Sandra's patient yet firm response to Ted's proposal is a moment of parenting many can relate to. She manages to navigate the tricky waters of acknowledging her son's creativity while steering him away from his less-than-ethical plan.

As someone who raised a chaotic-good and chaotic-neutral child, Ted's determination, coupled with a child’s unique logic, adds depth to his character and is very relatable. This makes him more than just a source of comic relief. You've managed to balance the light-hearted spirit of childhood with the hurdles in understanding the difference between right and wrong.

*Checkb*Grammar and Mechanics:
The story is well-written and free from noticeable grammar or spelling errors.

*Checkb*Final Thoughts:
This story is a delightful read with its blend of humor, warmth, and life lessons. It reminds us of the beauty in parenting's everyday chaos and the importance of supporting our children's dreams in a way that teaches them valuable lessons. It was a pleasure to find.

Thank you for sharing your work with us!

JayNaNoOhNo Author Icon*Smile*



My approach to reviews: "I'll Explain, but not DisclaimOpen in new Window.



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