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Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4741899
Review #4741899
Viewing a review of:
 Glitch?  [E]
A professor is not sure if his machine works.
by Hyperiongate
Review of Glitch?  
Review by
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Greetings from the House of Mormont!
By participating in a Writing.com activity called "Game of Thrones" , I am in no way endorsing the GoT franchise or identifying as a fan thereof. I’m here to help my team win *Smile*
*CakeB*HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*


A fast paced and amusing story here, where every word builds up to the absurd comedic irony of the absent minded professor/mad scientist who has no idea what he’s created. If we weren’t paying attention at the beginning, we would miss it. The cliches are classic, reminding us of works like Ray Bradbury’s A Sound of Thunder, which established the rule of not modifying the past because it would cause irreparable harm to the present.

I like to recommend using Size 4 Verdana font to ensure readability across devices. Also, it would be nice if we knew which “keywords” or prompt phrase was used when writing it for the contest. It’s always good to be able to look back and remember why exactly we wrote a particular story years down the road.

The phrase “ding dong” could be italicized so you can drop the quotation marks, as those are usually reserved for dialogue. Also, it’s not rated E if the professor says “d*mn;” he could just as easily have said “darn.” It’s only a doorbell. You can also add a third genre: I might suggest “fantasy” or “steampunk,” to make it easier to find when browsing.


The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.
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"The WDC Angel Army" 


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