%%USERNAME%%    %%ACCWORDS%% %%ONOFF%% |
 Review #4741884 |
| (4.5)| Hallo SantaBee  ! I will be reviewing your work "Lenore" on behalf of "House Targaryen Points" for "Game of Thrones"  Content: This is a short story about a man who receives a strange, yet troubling letter from the wife he left back home. So concerning is this letter, that he makes the choice to abandon a rather important meeting, just so he could return before it was too late. Unfortunately, what awaits him is nothing short of devastating. Pluses:Would you believe if I told you that I must be the only person on the planet who has not yet read Poe's work The Raven? Yes, I am embarrassed. However! I am aware of the basic gist of it, and know about the characters Lenore, and of course our good(?) friend the raven. Although the first section of the story seems to rely only on dialogue to convey the events taking place, it was done so very well. We could feel the tension and panic in the narrator, and you make the reader want to leap into the tale to make him hurry back home. The sense of foreboding is palpable. I also enjoyed the way you described some scenes; take for instance this section below: >> Fog crept over the wet streets. Visibility was poor. --- Trash scattered along the sidewalks and the stench of urine cut the fog. One can clearly see the dingy-gloom of the city, and it helps to heighten the emotions the narrator is experiencing. As for the ending paragraphs, when our narrator finally reaches his destination, he is met with a brother who seems far too gone to give him the answers he seeks, or perhaps the way he looked out the window told the narrator all he needed to know. We can feel his anguish at what has just taken place. Suggestions:Here are a few things I noticed while reading. Please remember that these are only my suggestions/opinions and it's ultimately up to you to choose what works best. >> “Very well.” James replied. There should be a comma after 'well', not a period.    Aside from the minor nitpick, this was a wonderful gothic tale that invokes the spirit of Edgar Allan Poe. Well done, and keep on writing!    Disclaimer: The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.  My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
|
|||
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
You responded to this review 04/04/2024 @ 6:08pm EDT