\"Writing.Com
*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
BY ONLINE AUTHORS
Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4741289
Review #4741289
Viewing a review of:
 The Children of the Euphrates Open in new Window. [E]
A widow with a secret.
by Scott Wilfred Hemsway Author Icon
Review by Lornda Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)


The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.



*Sun* I enjoyed reading your story! I thought your descriptions were great, and it put me right into the story. The opening paragraphs did a good job of setting the scene. The main character turned out to be something else. Lol! I wasn't expecting that from her, so good work with the twists here and there!

*Sun* As for feedback, I had to take-in a lot of characters all at once for this small of a word count. In the beginning of a story, it's always good to focus in on the main character. There are a few mentioned, and I get that it's setting the scene up, but I'm not sure we needed to know all of their full-names. You also might want to read it out loud because a couple of phrasing of the sentences sounded awkward.

*Sun* Overall, an interesting story with an outcome that was so surprising! The details are written very well, and I really appreciated the visual I got as I read a long. I think it's one of those stories that could be expanded out because the characters are so interesting to read about. I think your last genre choice should be 'Horror' because when I got to the end, that main character chick scared the livin' pajabbers out of me. *Laugh* I hope you do expand on it one day. Keep up the great work!

*Swords* Lornda




*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
   *NoteR* You have not yet responded to this review. Ignore
Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4741289