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 Review #4741279 |
 | The Children of the Euphrates  [E] A widow with a secret.  |
| (4.5)| Hallo Scott Wilfred Hemsway ! I will be reviewing your work "The Children of the Euphrates" on behalf of "House Targaryen Points" for "Game of Thrones"  Content: In a place called Lorrington, there are a group of misfits who are considered the children of Euphrates. This area is filled with a collection of unique characters, each with a dark role to play. There is something more about this neighborhood that meets the eye. Pluses:For some reason, you had me going to do some quick research on certain words and even on the title of the story because I was sure there was something historical related to it. However, while we all know of the river Euphrates, I'm not sure it has anything to do with this story. Why are these characters called that? I am more than curious to know. And then, I see the names used and I checked out your username - was this story autobiographical? Surely not. All the same, I really enjoyed the way you set up each character and their personalities with just a sentence or two. You really did manage to create the creepiest of individuals around even if they are doing seemingly 'innocent' things. Well...not quite. What and why are the Hemsways re-burying their brother who escaped the night before? Why does Katherine boil knit dolls? And why does her husband simply sit and rock an empty cot while singing? What is Alejandro burning? Although one might eventually figure it out when they get to the end of the story. And there's the priest, all dressed for mourning, but for whose funeral? The main feature of this story, however, is Margaret - who we learn is a widower of her own making. From all the little gestures and behaviour, she exhibits, it's easy to assume she's into witchcraft. It's a theory that's given credence when an innocent 'victim' is wooed into that particular section of town, where it seems everyone holds their breath for what's about to happen. I particularly enjoyed the feeling of suspense and tension you weave in that scene. Very nicely done. My only confusion comes with the last words she utters. Looking up the word 'chook', it appears to mean that the victim is being called a 'chicken'? Or is there something else behind it? Suggestions:The only suggestion I can think of is to perhaps consider expanding this. This story has so much potential to be something more, and I would be more than eager to know more about these fascinating characters.    Thanks for sharing, and write on!    Disclaimer: The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.  My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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