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Review #4714281
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Circle Open in new Window. [E]
Sometimes all you can do is breathe.
by Anni Pon Author Icon
Review of Circle  Open in new Window.
Review by Brian K Compton Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Dear Anni Pon Author Icon

I was struck by the simplicity and depth of your shaped poem, "Circle" Open in new Window.. It's concise, yet it encapsulates a profound theme - the cyclical nature of life. The visual representation of the circular shape reinforces this idea brilliantly.

Your choice of the repeated phrases "Life is a circle" and "There is no beginning / There is no ending" effectively emphasizes the eternal and unbroken nature of life's cycle. This repetition creates a rhythmic quality that mirrors the circular motion you're describing. It's a powerful poetic device that enhances the theme of your poem.

The use of directional cues In, Out and Out, In guides the read through a journey, reinforcing this idea of cycles. It's akin to a mantra, drawing the reader into the meditation on life's continuous flow.

To be so bold to suggest things for improvement, you might consider getting deeper into the emotional aspect of this cycle. Explore the feelings and experiences associated with reaching the top, where one must "breathe in while the air is thin," and reaching the bottom, where "the air gets too heavy." These moments in life carry significant emotional weight, and delving into them could add depth to the poem.

Another suggestion is to experiment with the visual presentation of the poem. Shaped poems offer a unique canvas for artistic expression. You could play with the font size, spacing, or even the arrangement of words to further emphasize the circular shape and enhance the visual impact. For example, you might consider varying the font size or indentation to visually represent the ascent and descent in the circle. This would not only add an extra layer of symbolism but also engage the reader's eyes more dynamically.

I found your poem to be thought-provoking and effectively conveyed the cyclical nature of life. Its simplicity and repetition were strengths, as I see, but getting into the emotions and experimenting with visual presentation could elevate this beautiful poem further.

Sincerely,

Brian
Super Power Reviewer🌟
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-font:times}Dear Anni Pon Author Icon


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