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Review #4242168
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by A Guest Visitor
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Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
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"Game of Thrones"  Open in new Window. by Gaby Author Icon

PLOT -
Stephen is a college student struggling with finances. When his belt breaks, he searches for a replacement to no avail. Creatively he uses rope to keep his pants from falling down, and hears both teasing and praise for the idea. Needing to use the bathroom he soon realizes the mistake of the rope, unable to loosen it or untie it.

SETTING -
Good descriptions throughout. Images of his skinny frame, eating ramen noodles to make end meet. The scene in the bathroom was vivid as well.

CHARACTERS -
Stephen who believes he's straight, but being around Keith he begins to question his sexuality. The two interact well, showing how Keith is a little bold, and Stephen is shy.

GRAMMAR/SPELLING/DIALOGUE -
The knot had tightened while he during the day, and now, in the bathroom, he couldn’t get it unknotted.---missing something, not clear

THOUGHTS -
Nice discovery story as these two characters interact and Stephen begins to question his sexual orientation. You had a good pace throughout, no rushing especially on the more pivotal scenes in the bathroom. Both characters were memorable. Good descriptions of the different scenes. Just might need a little more heat to really make it sizzle. Write on!
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This would be my name.
   *CheckG* You responded to this review 07/23/2016 @ 12:22pm EDT
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