You hated Jersey Shore with a passion. It was an opinion that your tightly-knit group of friends all shared. The idea that a group of party-loving, loud mouthed, dumb-as-box-of-rocks people were being touted as “tv stars” rankled you deeply.
But then again, wasn’t that unfortunately the norm now? Making stupid people famous?
“Certainly seems that way...” you grumbled under your breath.
You never saw Jersey Shore aside from commercials and tabloids and you weren’t about to change that.
However, everyone had a “weird celebrity crush”, and you were no exception. It just so happened that one of those oddball crushes that you kept hidden was on one of the girls from the infamous show, Nicole Polizzi, more commonly known as “Snooki”.
You weren’t quite sure what about the Jersey Shore star caught your attention. She was, in a lot of ways, a bit of an outlier compared to your other celebrity crushes. It was pretty normal to have crushes on beautiful celebrities like Kate Beckinsale, Kim Kardashian, or Mariah Carey, but having a crush on Snooki was a bit odd.
You generally tended to prefer thicker or curvier types of girls as opposed to the thin, supermodel types, and Snooki kind of fit the bill, being a bit on the chubby side while also being pretty top heavy for her small stature. You thought she was legitimately quite pretty in general, even considering her ridiculous hairstyles and fashion sense.
It was a purely physical attraction, though. For as much as you found her kind of pretty, her party animal nature was a total turn off.
“Eh,” you shrugged, “why not? I’ll humor myself a bit, see if this stupid app even works.”
You clicked on the blank icon beside your picture on the webpage, prompting another window to open up to select your “partner” from the files on your computer. You paged through your not insubstantial collection of photos and picked out a nice picture of your oddball crush.
http://cdn.posh24.se/images/:enlarge/p/1...
It was one of your favorite pictures of her. She was looking quite pretty with her bronzed skin, slightly chubby and busty figure, and silky, straight black hair. Her hair was piled on top of her head in that ridiculous “poof” she was known for and had red highlights scattered throughout. Her clothing was both flattering and stylish, a far more tame and possibly even fashionable look than what she usually wore on the show you didn’t watch, even if the bedazzled, gothic-lettered “Snooki” logo on her skirt was a bit much.
You clicked the picture and dragged it to the window. As soon as you released the click, an over-the-top animation of the picture being scanned and analyzed filled your screen.
“Huh,” you muttered in surprise, “this actually looks pretty ritzy for a supposed spam site.”
Facial Recognition Complete! Nicole Polizzi Identified! Is this correct?
You clicked the green YES button and your picture and Snooki’s reappeared, with a large dial appearing in between the two. The needle slowly moved away from the “0” mark, sweeping across the dial until it rested at...?
  indicates the next chapter needs to be written. |
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