"Now Charming, open your mouth, or you might find yourself in a much more . . . Painful situation."
Killian raised his hook to emphasize his point, literally. David's blue eyes widened at te gliint left by the hook. And opened his mouth in shock. Hook took advantage of this, and grinned. His teeth gave off an equally shiny glint, and he sat his meaty glute on David's face, making sure to get his slightly hairy stink hole over David's mouth.
"Now eat up, Charming. It's the only food prisoners get here on the Jolly Roger."
"I thought you were a good guy," David yelled against Hook's meat. "Wasn't that what you were trying to prove to Emma?"
"Well, Charming, the good man in me has always longed to win Emma's heart, but I am a pirate, after all. So I simply must punish you. Now shut up and eat my gas, bitch."
David gathered his courage, and tried to push Hook off his face. Both men were equally strong, after all, David had slain dragons and fought armies to protect Snow White and prove his valor, so what was a little rotten gas. But as he placed his hands on Hook's glutes to push them off, he felt around a little bit before launching Hook away.
Hook caught himself before he could fall, and smirked when he realized he was right about David.
"I knew it," Hook said. "You fancy me and my ass."
"What?" David said, and then clenched his hands into fists.
"It's nothing to be ashamed of, David. I am devilishly handsome after all."
"I'm not gay. And even if I were, I think I could do better."
"Oh really?" Hook cocked one eyebrow with that sexy smirk still set on his face. "Is that why you were giving my ass a deep tissue massage before finally pushing me off?"
"Get over yourself pirate."
Killian laughed and lifted his hook, and David lowered his fists in defeat.
"Now then, let's see if you need a little push to admit your feelings for me. Let's see how long it takes for you to rub my ass again."
And so Hook sat on Charming's face with his glutes that defied the laws of physics. He farted once, and David dug his nails into the wooden floors, refusing to satisfy Hook's sadistic desires by touching his ass.
"Not budging, eh?" Hook asked. "Fine then, let's kick it up a notch."