Soifon hated physicals.
This was a common fact, known by pretty much everyone in the 2nd division, as well as anyone who knew the short captain. Not a big surprise, considering there were many thing that she hated. Urahara Kisuke was at the top of her list. Still, Soifon was not fond of these physicals, because it meant she had to expose herself to whoever was doing said examination. Neither were the medics in the 4th division. They were the ones who had to be in a small room with the agitated captain, after all.
But that wasn't the sole reason. She just didn't like them; simple as that. Soifon believed in living a healthy, challenging life filled with constant exercise. That's why she was very fit, and why the female shinigami didn't see the point in doing these stupid examinations. Alas, even the captains had to be checked up from time to time, per the captain-commander's orders.
"Let's get this over with..." Soifon grumbled in annoyance. She was sat on a bed, eyes scanning the medical equipment inside the small room; everything was neatly stored away and proper. As expected of the 4th division's barracks. "At least it's you this time."
"Ah, well, captain Unohana thought it would be better if I was the one to do your physical. She wasn't, um, really happy with what happened last time."
Considering she'd thrown the previous medic through a wall, creating a massive hole that had needed lots of repairs and the necessary paperwork for hiring carpenters? Yes, perhaps so. But Soifon could have sworn the bastard had been too frisky at the time.
And was it really her fault? Unohana knew of her dislike for physicals and medics, and then the older woman had decided to pick some random guy, instead of vice-captain Isane?
That was just asking for trouble, if you asked her.
"Oh? And why would that be, hmm?" Soifon smirked, crossing her arms over her small bust.
"Y-y-you know why!"
The boy's face flushed red with embarrassment, and she could hold her bemusement no longer; Soifon broke out giggling. Had lady Yoruchi been here, the purple-haired woman would have shed tears after hearing her apprentice tease someone.
But that was just part of his charm. Contrary to popular belief, she wasn't heartless or without emotions. Hell, she was a woman too! Even Soifon could appreciate love and being in a relationship, despite not having had any love for anyone save her idol, and neither having had any relationship whatsoever.
At least, not until recently.
It was strange to imagine; her coming to the 4th division barracks because she had suffered an injury during training, and meeting this young man. Yes, he was unremarkable, plain, shy and weak. Those were not qualities she'd ever thought she would come to appreciate. Yet somehow, this medic had managed to charm her with his kindness, cute behavior, selflessness and willingness to put up with her own stubborn character.
Oh, and he also thought Yoruichi was a badass, without actually lusting after the Flash Goddess. He scored major point in her book for that.
Soifon rolled her eyes, though the smirk remained plastered on her face. "Come now; we've been together for three months at this point. Don't you think it's about time you stop being embarrassed for being my boyfriend.
Hanataro Yamada, the shy and kind seventh seat of his division, smiled wryly. "I suppose... It's just, I'm still surprised you decided to go out with me."
"Tch. Typical Hanataro behavior." The kunoichi shook her head. It really was typical of him to talk like that. "Just accept it already. Speaking of which, I've accepted my fate, so could we get this physical started?"
"Sure thing. Just give me a moment to get my stuff."
They spent the next fifteen minutes conversing with each other while Hanataro went through each step of the physical. For someone who was not that confident, Soifon admired his medical knowledge and drive. She understood why he'd been given a seat inside his division.
Soifon welcomed the distraction. Truth be told, she'd been agitated as of late. Not because of the oaf that was her vice-captain, nor having to work together with irritating colleagues, but rather her own shortcomings.
It all came down to her relationship with Yoruichi. Ever since her role model had left her without even a single goodbye, Soifon had trained hard to become stronger, more powerful. She had put her body through hell in order to get past her limits. To become faster than ever.
Because she wanted to surpass Yoruichi.
And while Soifon was arguably one of the strongest shinigami in the Soul Society, there was still that nagging doubt that it was not enough; Yoruichi was still better. Now, she did admire her mentor a lot, and some of her fantasies about the dark-skinned beauty were... particularly exciting, so to speak. However, that didn't wash away the years of anger, resentment and frustration.
More than once did she imagine herself growing stronger than Yoruichi, putting the woman in her place -- at Soifon's feet. These dark desires were ever present inside the diminutive captain. But she didn't act on them. Not when there was no way she could fulfill them.
"Right, that should be all." Hanataro announced after a while, breaking her out of her thoughts. "I'll write a few more things down, but you're in great shape -- like always. Captain Unohana will be pleased."
"Alright then."
Soifon nodded and put the upper part of her robe back on. She smirked as she noticed her boyfriend eye her toned arms, watching the shape of her small biceps. Being so close to him, she was more than aware of his love for muscular girls.
"See something you like?" She teased him once more. Not that his embarrassed reaction would ever get tiresome. "Maybe you should join me for my next workout? It'd be nice to put on some more muscle, and you could use some too."
"I usually work out with Ikaku-san, but that would be great! Though I'm not sure if I can find the time. Captain Unohana has tasked me with a project, which is very time-consuming." Hanataro rubbed the back his head awkwardly.
Soifon's curiosity was piqued. "What kind of project? I don't recall her ever mentioning this."
"Well, it's supposed to be a secret, because she doesn't want captain Kurotsuchi to hear about this. The captain doesn't like him interfering." He shrugged. Understandable, since even she knew of the rivalry between the two fellow officers. Mayuri was fond of hoarding all development projects. "We're creating a new mod soul candy, but it functions as a power booster. Kind of like the energy pills our division has. Only this time, the candy is supposed to make a person stronger. Should be valuable for in combat."
That was... perfect! Soifon couldn't believe what she was hearing! A mod soul candy that gave the user a power boost was just the thing she needed to beat Yoruichi.
"What kind of boost are we talking about?" She asked in a nonchalant manner; just to mask her curiosity.
Hanataro put down his clipboard, trying to recall the details. "For starters, it increases your spiritual energy levels. We don't know how much, since it depends on who consumes the candy, but enough to make a big difference. Then there's the increase in physical strength. Yeah, it sounds a bit weird, but the candy somehow forces the muscles to tear themselves down and then build up again, yet stronger than before."
"Such a supplement would revolutionize our way of fighting Hollows!" Soifon's eyes widened.
To think that such a thing was possible. Many scientists -- Urahara and Kurotsuchi among them -- had attempted to increase a shinigami's potential through various means, though not without failure.
"That's what captain Unohana thinks. Our tests have been fruitful so far. Both the captain and vice-captain Isane have tried the candies themselves, and they've seen an increase in muscle mass." He shifted uncomfortably in his seat under Soifon's stare.
Knowing his preferences in women, it was hard not to notice how excited he sounded when describing their condition. Still, Soifon didn't really mind. As long as he looked only, and didn't cheat on her.
"So, Hanataro, is there any chance you have some of those candies left?" She lowered her eyelids slightly, mimicking vice-captain Matsumoto. Funny how she'd dismissed the woman's seduction techniques before, yet found use for them now. "I wouldn't mind trying them out."
"Ah, I don't know, Soifon. Captain Unohana was very strict when she said I couldn't tell anyone."
"I'm sure she wouldn't mind. As a captain, I understand the need for secrecy. It's just that the project would go smoother if another figure of authority approved of it." Soifon smirked as she saw the doubt form in his eyes. Smelling blood in the water, she went in for the kill. "Is it because you wouldn't like it if I get a bit more muscular?"
That was enough to win him over. "Well, I guess it wouldn't hurt..."
The short medic walked over to a nearby cabinet, opened one of the drawers and retrieved a small bottle. Soifon eagerly accepted the small container. She peered inside and saw multiple pills, colored a dark blue.
"So, I take one of these? Are the results instantaneous?"
"Yes, but these are the newest version." Hanataro explained. "Captain Unohana and Isane took the previous ones, which required physical effort. These candies, on the other hand, grant instant growth. But I advise you to take only one. We don't know what happens if you take more than one at a time."
"Thank you for the gift then." Soifon grinned, before leaning in to place a quick kiss on his cheek. The dark-haired boy smiled in response. "I'll be back soon. First, I have a meeting with lady Yoruichi..."