TF Chaos in South Park

One day as the four boys where walking around South Park looking for something to do they noticed a old strange looking house that they hadn't noticed before. "Heh that's weird. How come we never noticed that before?" Stan asked. "Mph mmpph mph mmmpphh mpphh mp mmmppphh!" Kenny replied. Kyle frowned. "No it's not. Look at that hedge around the front gate. Someone obviously cut it back. That's why we never noticed it before. Probably thought it was a park of something." Cartman sneers. "Yeah ok jewboy. That's enough lame bull*8t. I think we all know what needs to be done here. Everyone follow me." Cartman goes up to the front gate which of course unsecured and pushes it open before walking inside. They other three guys follow him and notice the gargoyles and gothic architecture.(Ok it looks like that bloody Amityvillie house. There. I said it. You happy? Good on with the story.)

Stan decides to speak up for common sense. "Um..guys are you sure this is really a good idea. I mean it does look like some kind of weird house of horrors so why are we going inside again?" Cartman rolls his eyes. "Well well well what a surprise. We haven't even gone inside and already Stan Marsh is wetting his *panties* in fear. Look. I'm bored. I'm gonna go do something cool.*he points at the house* If you wusses want to go play hopscotch and Barbie dolls that's fine with me but I'm telling you there'll be some cool stuff in that house." The boys look uncertain and Kyle speaks up. "Look fatass. There's no reason to think there will be anything interesting or cool in there. It's a run down house. I bet no one even lives there anymore. It's probably just full of rats, cockroaches and rotten floorboards." Cartman folds his arms and then speaks. "Ok fine be a d*8k. But if you guys don't go in here with me I'll tell everyone at school what a bunch of fa*8#ts you are." Cartman now turns around opens the door and heads into the house. The rest of the boys look at each other and then follow him.

"God. He's such a d*8k." Stan says as they enter the entrance hall of the house. The ceiling is fairly high and there are a couple of staircases as well as a couple of doors on the ground floor that lead to other rooms. The place looks dark and rundown now but probably passed for luxury and refinement in the days when it was still inhabited.

The boys look around for a few seconds then decide to...