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 |  This is my blog & my hope, writing daily will help me see my progress and log supporters. |
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| There are many things a man can do to remain attractive/loveable to his partner. I think buying flowers ranks pretty low on the list of things a man can do to spark the look from his lover that he craves. The reason I put the act of buying flowers so low is because they are too convenient and could be seen as an afterthought, or worse...that he is only doing it to get something in return. Things that sparkle may have more impact, but cannot (and should not) be given often for obvious reasons. They say the sexiest man in the world regularly wears an apron, and helping with the housework is a no-brainer when it comes to impressing the woman we love. But again, women are not stupid and will see right through our kind gesture if it's only done in exchange for sex. If a man is smart, he can usually get what he wants simply by showing his partner that he loves and desires her. The fact is that if it is more sex we want, we don't have to buy it by giving gifts, but we do need to earn it. Telling her she is sexy is great, but our desire for her body isn't enough and we need to express gratitude for all the things she brings to our life. I know it's early days for Nada and me, but I am acutely aware that I need to be receptive to her moods and act appropriately. Pressure to have sex is the biggest turn-off. And not just for women but for men as well. I'm not going to lie and say that I don't plan ahead when I'm feeling amorous. Foreplay begins WAY before I say anything suggestive. I can easily let her know I'm in the mood without saying a word. Complimenting Nada on her cooking skills and telling her how sexy she is throughout the day should not just be me laying down the platform, but needs to be the truth, otherwise, she will see right through me and my plans to have my way with her. Trust within a relationship is paramount, and without it, there really isn't much a man can do to get what he wants...and I'm not just referring to sex. I believe that a bitter truth will result in a better outcome than a sweet lie. And even though it might seem like the right thing to do at the time, lies will only bring heartbreak and sorrow to a relationship. "Does my bum look big in these pants?" It's a question that IMO should never be asked of a man because all it does is put him on the spot...especially if the bum does look big in whatever she is wearing. Nada and I have already been through this scenario and I told her that there are some pants she has that look better on her than others. That's the truth. There is always a way to deal with situations like that without causing harm to a woman's self-esteem...which if handled badly, will inevitably lessen her desire for sex. But still, asking questions like that can be a sign of insecurity. Let's face it, men are not the only ones who want a good sexual relationship with their partners, and if a woman seeks more sex it's more important that she feels sexy, rather than fitting into any stereotype of what society has convinced her IS sexy. And finally, the best way for me to make Nada want me is to make her laugh. I admit that is more of a challenge than it was in my previous relationships due to the language barrier preventing my words from having the desired effect on her. So, I now resort to more visual comedy. I'm a natural-born clown, and acting may have been something I could have been good at. I take a leaf from some of the comedians I grew up watching. My Mom was British, and people like Tommy Cooper, Dave Allen and Benny Hill could make their audiences laugh without saying a word. I never could have imagined that they would help me get laid long after their time had passed. |
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