Memories of Snow

NaNoWriMo Day28: Thoughts and More Poems (WC:1101)

Kamál (Perfection), 8 Qawl (Speech), 173 BE - Monday, November 28, 2016 AD about 2:12 PM Pacific Standard Time

Thoughts on Death and Other Things

It's been a good day so far. I think I've managed to get the 30-day Blogging Challenge prompts straightened out. I managed to post about three on the wrong days. There is only two day left, but there is only one prompt posted. The person who posted it wanted it used on Wednesday, November 30, so I don't know what the prompt for Tuesday, November 29, is going to be. If there's no prompt posted by someone before tomorrow then I'll presume it's a free day. If that's the case then I'll probably write something about Mama.

Today I received a Christmas card with a scarlet poinsettia on the front. Inside was a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year wish and a handwritten note. There was also a bible verse: "How great is your name, O Lord, through all the earth." Psalm 8:1. I keep picking up the card and looking at the front of it. I remember somebody giving Mom and I a poinsettia once. It bloomed for a long time and then eventually it died. I'm not a person who can keep flowers alive. The real one's always die on me. The only flowers I seem to be able to keep alive are plastic and silk flowers.

Today is Cyber Monday and there is a sale on writing.com. I sent an Appreciation merit badge to a friend who is having a bit of a rough time. I can understand that because this is a rough time of year. It's the holiday season when people are supposed to be happy, but instead many people encounter depression. The depression can be caused by many things from loneliness to the short days and long nights. I've been waltzing with depression for the past few days.

My depression could be caused by a number of things. There was a man murdered in apartment number 7 this past week. He tried to rob a dope dealer. Then the dealer's sister pulled his body out of the apartment into the courtyard or the alley. The police let it lay there for several hours while they investigated and waited for the coroner. For the past several days his family and friends have been putting candles around the place where his body lay so long.

Yesterday, my nephew had his mother transported home from the hospital because she wanted to die at home. I don't think she has long to live because when I logged into Facebook this morning, my niece said she was sitting at her mother's bedside. There have been so many deaths lately that it's no wonder people are depressed. Frank's supposed to come into town today to stay with his children. I don't know what to say, but I don't think there's much a person can say in a case like this. I just need to pray for the living and the dead. Prayer is the only thing that will help in these types of situations.

Poems and Their Inspiration

Incongruity was written in 1992 while I was attending the University of Nevada Las Vegas. The inspiration was parking in one of the student parking lots on a rainy day. When I parked my car I noticed that the sprinklers were watering the lawn while it was raining.

Incongruity

Incongruity
Sprinklers watering the lawn
While it is raining

The Judgment Comes: To Adrienne Rich was written sometime in 1991. This is another one of my poems that was inspired by reading the poems of another poet. I believe when I wrote this poem I was taking a creative writing course in poetry.

The Judgment Comes:
To Adrien Rich

Numbered, numbered, weighed and divided!
The judgment comes
After...
Causing me to repeat,
Like a broken record
Playing in the dark.
You know me better than I know myself.

The judgment comes
Verbalizing,
In the language of the oppressor...
Burning libraries of ancient text.
The oppressor's knowledge emphasizes
...at least on paper...
Humanity's lack of moral impulse;
Emphasizes suffering,
Not as a means of overcoming self,
But instead
As a means of punishing children.

The judgment comes
Replaying meditations...
The scars of destruction visible
for all to see;
The scars of repair grow in silence
Waiting for a...
The savage is subdued,
While the child,
...the one that can't grow up...
Is placed in protective custody.

Thoughts on Lighting
I've encountered a slight problem this fall. The sun goes down early so it gets dark earlier. This make it difficult to see the pages with my poems on them. The light I use is on a stand by the recliner. It's dark by my computer because the light from the monitor doesn't cast enough brightness to see the pages. This is making it difficult to see what I'm writing. I'm going to have to change the time work on this journal. I'm planning to continue the journal until I have all the chapters filled, so I'll have to work on it in the morning.

Fortunately in December I won't have to worry about a specific word count each day. In addition, I can have several days writing in one chapter. That still doesn't help the lighting situation in this apartment. In addition, I think I need the prescription changed in my eyeglasses. That cost money, money which I don't have. Thinking about my financial difficulties just makes my depression worse and it interferes with my writing. I still have so much writing to do and I'm going to have to limit it to the daytime. That would help the lighting problem a little bit.

Another problem is the location of the windows. The sun doesn't shine directly into them so it doesn't help me see the pages I'm looking at. I need to stop bitching and do something about the situation. I hate the idea of moving. I've always hated moving. However, there isn't anything I can do about it, so I'm going to have to find a cheaper place to live. I'm also going to have to stop bitching because it doesn't do any good.

I turned the light on and it does help a little. I may have to turn the television on to see if that will shed more light on this area of the house. I still may have to change the time of day I work on this journal, but I won't have to do that until December, which is just a couple of days away.

Kamál (Perfection), 8 Qawl (Speech), 173 BE - Monday, November 28, 2016 AD about 2:12 PM Pacific Standard Time

Thoughts on Death and Other Things

It's been a good day so far. I think I've managed to get the 30-day Blogging Challenge prompts straightened out. I managed to post about three on the wrong days. There is only two day left, but there is only one prompt posted. The person who posted it wanted it used on Wednesday, November 30, so I don't know what the prompt for Tuesday, November 29, is going to be. If there's no prompt posted by someone before tomorrow then I'll presume it's a free day. If that's the case then I'll probably write something about Mama.

Today I received a Christmas card with a scarlet poinsettia on the front. Inside was a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year wish and a handwritten note. There was also a bible verse: "How great is your name, O Lord, through all the earth." Psalm 8:1. I keep picking up the card and looking at the front of it. I remember somebody giving Mom and I a poinsettia once. It bloomed for a long time and then eventually it died. I'm not a person who can keep flowers alive. The real one's always die on me. The only flowers I seem to be able to keep alive are plastic and silk flowers.

Today is Cyber Monday and there is a sale on writing.com. I sent an Appreciation merit badge to a friend who is having a bit of a rough time. I can understand that because this is a rough time of year. It's the holiday season when people are supposed to be happy, but instead many people encounter depression. The depression can be caused by many things from loneliness to the short days and long nights. I've been waltzing with depression for the past few days.

My depression could be caused by a number of things. There was a man murdered in apartment number 7 this past week. He tried to rob a dope dealer. Then the dealer's sister pulled his body out of the apartment into the courtyard or the alley. The police let it lay there for several hours while they investigated and waited for the coroner. For the past several days his family and friends have been putting candles around the place where his body lay so long.

Yesterday, my nephew had his mother transported home from the hospital because she wanted to die at home. I don't think she has long to live because when I logged into Facebook this morning, my niece said she was sitting at her mother's bedside. There have been so many deaths lately that it's no wonder people are depressed. Frank's supposed to come into town today to stay with his children. I don't know what to say, but I don't think there's much a person can say in a case like this. I just need to pray for the living and the dead. Prayer is the only thing that will help in these types of situations.

Poems and Their Inspiration

Incongruity was written in 1992 while I was attending the University of Nevada Las Vegas. The inspiration was parking in one of the student parking lots on a rainy day. When I parked my car I noticed that the sprinklers were watering the lawn while it was raining.

Incongruity

Incongruity
Sprinklers watering the lawn
While it is raining

The Judgment Comes: To Adrienne Rich was written sometime in 1991. This is another one of my poems that was inspired by reading the poems of another poet. I believe when I wrote this poem I was taking a creative writing course in poetry.

The Judgment Comes:
To Adrien Rich

Numbered, numbered, weighed and divided!
The judgment comes
After...
Causing me to repeat,
Like a broken record
Playing in the dark.
You know me better than I know myself.

The judgment comes
Verbalizing,
In the language of the oppressor...
Burning libraries of ancient text.
The oppressor's knowledge emphasizes
...at least on paper...
Humanity's lack of moral impulse;
Emphasizes suffering,
Not as a means of overcoming self,
But instead
As a means of punishing children.

The judgment comes
Replaying meditations...
The scars of destruction visible
for all to see;
The scars of repair grow in silence
Waiting for a...
The savage is subdued,
While the child,
...the one that can't grow up...
Is placed in protective custody.

Thoughts on Lighting
I've encountered a slight problem this fall. The sun goes down early so it gets dark earlier. This make it difficult to see the pages with my poems on them. The light I use is on a stand by the recliner. It's dark by my computer because the light from the monitor doesn't cast enough brightness to see the pages. This is making it difficult to see what I'm writing. I'm going to have to change the time work on this journal. I'm planning to continue the journal until I have all the chapters filled, so I'll have to work on it in the morning.

Fortunately in December I won't have to worry about a specific word count each day. In addition, I can have several days writing in one chapter. That still doesn't help the lighting situation in this apartment. In addition, I think I need the prescription changed in my eyeglasses. That cost money, money which I don't have. Thinking about my financial difficulties just makes my depression worse and it interferes with my writing. I still have so much writing to do and I'm going to have to limit it to the daytime. That would help the lighting problem a little bit.

Another problem is the location of the windows. The sun doesn't shine directly into them so it doesn't help me see the pages I'm looking at. I need to stop bitching and do something about the situation. I hate the idea of moving. I've always hated moving. However, there isn't anything I can do about it, so I'm going to have to find a cheaper place to live. I'm also going to have to stop bitching because it doesn't do any good.

I turned the light on and it does help a little. I may have to turn the television on to see if that will shed more light on this area of the house. I still may have to change the time of day I work on this journal, but I won't have to do that until December, which is just a couple of days away.