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Printed from https://writing.com/main/books/entry_id/879501-to-Caleb-again
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by Rhyssa Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 18+ · Book · Contest Entry · #2081410
my entries for the Construct Cup
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#879501 added April 16, 2016 at 1:23am
Restrictions: None
to Caleb, again
since that day,
I spend my every April
contemplating might-have-beens.

you would have been four
this year. you would have
snuggled under my heart
for long moments
before abandoning me
to play cars
to watch cartoons
to slip unseen into the kitchen
and pour dishwashing liquid
across the floor.

you would have sat there,
looked up with gleeful eyes
because you knew it was
forbidden, and I would try
not to laugh
as I cleaned up you
and the floor.

you would have picked
your favorite book,
pretending to read to me
with your little finger
tracking memorized lines,
and I would smell
the soap in your hair
and wonder how your feet
had caught so much dirt already.

you would have chosen friends
and opened gifts
and the house would have rang
with the sounds of little children.

instead, I blow out four candles
with thirty-nine year lungs,
and sing for you,
hoping the echoes reach
where you have gone.

Prompt: 15 April 2016

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