Who Do I Think I Am??

This one's about what the lookalike looks like.

30DBC PROMPT: "Do you have any friends, family or neighbors that have a dog or cat or any kind of animal that resembles its owner? Describe what it is about the human and animal that share the same characteristics."

Good afternoon y'all. Three words for today's "30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS"  prompt: null and void.

It's simple, really. I have no friends, I have no clue if my remaining family has any pets, and the building I live in doesn't allow animals (besides some of the floating algae that pass through). So no offense to Grace♥Leo health issues , but I have zero frame of reference to address this prompt properly. Not your fault Grace, because how would you know any of that?

Ok, the "friends" part isn't entirely true. All my friends live everywhere else but where I live. And I'm not into comparing people to dogs really. I don't think my female friends would appreciate me saying, "Awww, your Pug is soooo cute! He's got your cheeks!", nor would they like to hear how much I think they resemble their hairless Chihuahua. I mean, even I know when not to cross certain lines.

But we've all seen those Wilford Brimley- lookin' types of fellas, kicked back on their porch with a cheap can of whatever and a fat ass St. Bernard pantin' away like it's the hardest thing he'll do all day. And you wouldn't be able to tell one from the other after about six or seven cans of whatever's in that miniature barrel around the St. Bernard's neck. Unless the dog started wearing glasses.

We had a couple of guys like that when I worked for the pharmacy (I won't mention the name because there's no need to talk bad about the non-existent) in my old neighborhood. About an hour or two after we opened, they'd start showing up for a 12-pack of the cheap stuff. And if you had the fortune of working a full-time shift, you'd see them come in for another 12-pack in the afternoon, looking like they should've just checked into the SPCA instead of AA. That, and occasionally they'd smell like urine, but this area of internetical medicine isn't licensed in this universe to judge incontinence. By law, we could've turned them away for being intoxicated, but since they were always grumpy yet not enough to the length of belligerence (and corporations want that almighty beer-margin profit), we sold it to them anyway. Even if it meant one more 12-pack we'd have to restock at the end of the day. Nobody like to send the strays back out onto the streets empty-handed.

I guess that's the best example I can give. I'm sure there's many instances of the animal/owner likeness phenomenon out there; I just don't have any in my personal life and don't feel like trolling Facebook memes to find any. Ohhhhhh.... holdupwaitaminute...there's always room for this comparative nugget when it comes to people looking like animals.... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=85LHnH5WftI (and yes, I'm aware it's in a foreign language...I'm sparing you all from the explicit version in English. And besides, when you've seen one, you've seen almost all of them.).

BCF PROMPT: "Describe your ideal dress: what clothing/outift do you feel best expresses who you are?"

I honestly don't believe there's a right or wrong answer here to this "Blogging Circle of Friends Prompt Forum"  query. And it's simple. Dress is 90% mood-driven, and 10% purpose. 80% comfort and 20% style. I could go on and on with percentages, but this is writing and not arithmetic.

You look how you feel and you feel how you look. Ideally, I'd like to be comfortable and look decent at the same time. And I'm pretty sure we saw this prompt (or something like it) recently. Yes we did...here: "This one's about labels and f-bombs. Lotsa f-bombs." .

I went though a phase where I'd only wear baggy khakis with hockey jerseys. I still rock that look like it was 2001 from time to time. Or the button-down with the sleeves rolled up and some baggy cargos. Chuck Taylors or Adidas shell-toes. Golf hats, MLB hats (New Era official 59Fifty: http://shop.neweracap.com/new-era-59fifty/gender_mens) or beanies. If I have to dress extra nice, I make sure my jacket is dry-cleaned. Fedoras and Kangols. Skinny jeans (when I'm at my ideal weight). I have no problem wearing stripes or patterns.

It's safe to assume that at one point (and it may still hold true) I owned more clothes and shoes than one man ever should. But who the hell am I foolin'? I'd rather be naked.

MUSICAL BREAK:

Tough decision today. Do I go with the light alternative rock song by a band with a questionable name, or the censored but still bangin' hip-hop song? Since the actual video doesn't seem to exist on Youtube anymore, there's this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H833o5lnB2E.

So you get this instead...

VITAL STATS:

Even though I'm sitting here with my earbuds in, I'm not listening to anything. That doesn't make me immune to noise though, and some chucklehead for the last hour has been doing something on the other side of the room on his phone...sounds like he's been scrolling through his contacts repeatedly. I'd like to make my fist one of the contacts to his eye socket, but I don't need to catch a case.

Actually feeling better today. Still rockin' the sexy stuffed-up nasal passage voice, which, if you didn't know my voice, is at least a 50% improvement over my healthy voice. Word.

Halls cough drops have little inspiration messages on their wrappers now. I just got one that says "Flex your 'can do' muscle." Exactly where within the confines of this ravaged temple of a body is that??

Ok, on to bigger and better things if I'm gonna be flexin' anything today. Peace, it's what you want baby, and GOODNIGHT NOW!!